At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of the young aldults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantage

#time #population #countries #aldults #people #situation

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The earth has been changing in recent years and one of the most significant altered is the amount of young and elderly society. While young and teenagers

Change the verb form

are

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becoming high , a number of the old generation is felling down. In

this

Linking Words

essay , I will discuss what can be benefits and drawbacks that statements from the countries' perspectives.

First

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of all , elderly people are the backbone of the countries because they are a heritage to history. Without them , tradition and morals can not carry from generation to generation. In

this

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case , amount of old people ,which is addressed today up to 60s people ,

necessary

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are necessary

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for cultural development and represented

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apply

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country

Change noun form

country's

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attitude. As an example , according to one of the Turkey survey

company

Fix the agreement mistake

companies

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, in Turkey , most of the children growing up with their grandparents and compare to Europe , they are more connected with their traditional events , within same survey agent shows that the toddler who grew up with old folk , they are more respectful to

elderly

Add an article

the elderly

an elderly

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population when they are in teen ages.

On the other hand

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, considering the economic issues : a number of the young crowd is beneficial to the country's improvements. The world is open hand to technology and artificial intelligence which is developed by fresh brains. The advance of the state is encompassed to the young nations.

For instance

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, almost all of the European region has much older folks than the youngest ,

therefore

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, most of the states in Europe asked for new graduates or middle age immigrants from

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third developed

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third-developed

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countries. Today , still governments

such

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as Germany , France and even UK need to young labour force because they can not find workers. To sum up ,

although

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golden agers are

powerful

Correct article usage

a powerful

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effect on society, a land

need

Change the verb form

needs

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Change preposition

apply

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younger ages to develop

their

Correct pronoun usage

its

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stages.

Submitted by b.sfkozel on Mon Dec 19 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

313 words

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of the young aldults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantage

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events.Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, more people move away from their friends and families for work. Do advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In education and employment, some people work harder than others. Why do some people work harder? Is it always a good thing to work hard?

It is observed that in many countries not enough students are choosing to study science as a subject. What are the causes? And what will be the effects on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

These days, in many countries, fewer and fewer people want to become teachers, particularly in secondary schools. What are the reasons for this, and how could the problem be solved?