IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Task 1 Academic The number of tourists visiting a particular Caribbean island between 2010 and 2017.

#tourists #caribbean #island
The chart illustrates the
amount
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number
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 of tourists visiting a particular island of
Correct article usage
the Carribea
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Carribea
Correct your spelling
Caribbean
 between 2010 to 2017. The
number
 of
visitors
are
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is
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 broken down into the
one
 who stayed on cruise
ships
 and the
one
 who stayed on the island. Overall,
number
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the number
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 of
visitors
 was significantly decreasing
through out
Correct your spelling
throughout
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 the given time period from only
one
million
 in 2010 to 3.5
million
 in 2017. The
number
 of
visitors
 who remained on the
ships
 are fluctuating during the
first
 three years. it was started out at 0.25 in 2010 and
doubling
Wrong verb form
doubled
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 to 0.5 the following year. Yet, it was fall back to the exact
number
 that it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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started in the year
of
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apply
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2012. In the
next
 years, it tend to increase annually and ended up having 2
million
 people visiting the ship in 2017. Meanwhile, the
number
 of
visitors
 who chose to spend their time on the island was more than the
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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 who sails on the
ships
 in 2010, which
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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accounted for 0.75
million
. It
then
increasing
Wrong verb form
increased
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 to
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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1.5 in 2013 and plateaued until 2015, just before it decreased by 0.25 in 2016.
Finally
, in 2017, it has
less
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fewer
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visitors
 than
the
Correct article usage
apply
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cruise
ships
, with just 1.5
million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
visitors
 respectively.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • fluctuation
  • peak
  • trough
  • upward trend
  • downward trend
  • steady increase
  • sharp decline
  • seasonal variation
  • cruise ship visitors
  • island stay visitors
  • economic impact
  • environmental impact
  • tourism industry
  • sustainable tourism
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