Human activity has hurt planet animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others think actions can be taken to bring about a change. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many
people
believed that activities or research that are done by humans hurt the earth and birds or animals. Few
people
argue that
this
is impossible to
change
.
however
, few think that rules and regulations should be established to bring
change
. I partially agree with both statements as human interference can be dangerous for nature as well as other species and it cannot be changed but actions by the government can
change
it.
Firstly
, scientists' experiments with different things ,
for instance
, digging the land, cutting forests, and new technologies can have a major chance
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
harming animals and lands.
Furthermore
, these days due to
extra ordinary
Correct your spelling
extraordinary
show examples
research world is facing global warming effects.
People
's arguments towards new methods can lead to a virus like a corona and the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
whole country suffered from
this
.
Crowd
Add an article
The crowd
A crowd
show examples
can not stop their investigation if they stop
then
the progress of technology could be stopped.
Moreover
, when the public
find
Change the verb form
finds
show examples
new vaccine
then
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
first
try them on wild animals, which could be injurious to their physical and mental health. Folks always use insects for their personal benefit and sacrifice of
planet's
Correct article usage
the planet's
show examples
healthiness
Replace the word
health
show examples
. If the public can stop testing
then
their country can not progress in the world and started the downfall.
however
, public awareness and government laws can prevent nature from
people
. Authority should try to start an information camp that helps common
people
to care about
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
. In ,addition ruling party must introduce
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
strict
rules
Correct the article-noun agreement
rule
show examples
that
protects
Change the verb form
protect
show examples
globe
Correct article usage
the globe
show examples
.
Consequently
, the world health organization can arrange rules for all nations that could play a vital role to
change
. To conclude, stopping all activities could
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
abolish countries' overall growth and income.
Nevertheless
Add a comma
,Nevertheless
show examples
the healthy amount of care for nature and some restrictions made by
Correct article usage
the administrative
show examples
administrative
Replace the word
administration
show examples
may help to protect the earth.
Submitted by paramravalia24 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: