SOME PEOPLE TODAY PREFER TO GET ADVICE FOR MEDICAL PROBLEMS AND DO NOT WANT TO VISIT A DOCTOR WHY IS THIS? IS THIS A POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE DEVELOPMENT?

In the time of 21st century, people do not like to visit
doctors
due to
heavy
Correct article usage
the heavy
show examples
queue of hospitals and trust issues are the main problem, which is many of them faces in their routine life.
However
, sometimes it is good to
be cure
Change the verb form
cure
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
normal problems and
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
at
house
Add an article
the house
a house
show examples
with several
home-remedies
Correct your spelling
home remedies
show examples
.
To begin
with, in
this
modern era, humans are always so careful about their health-related issues. Some individuals are always worried about their health and they regularly do their routine
check-up
Fix the agreement mistake
check-ups
show examples
. Whereas, nowadays communities get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
basic medicine without
needed
Change the form of the verb
needing
show examples
any kind of prescriptions.
Also
, in some cases
such
as vehicle accidents and in other emergency cases
doctors
are required for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fast healing and better improvement for
human
Add an article
the human
show examples
body.
On the other hand
, others believe that it
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
mandatory to prefer
doctor
Correct article usage
a doctor
show examples
for normal
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because some medical problems
such
as fever, cold and diarrhoea
are easily cure
Change the verb form
are easily cured
are easily curing
show examples
at home with
follow
Change the verb form
following
show examples
the precautions.
Moreover
,
from
Change preposition
with
show examples
the use of technology public easily get information about various medicines, which
is help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
with a lower cost compared to hospitals.
For example
, at the time of
covid
Add an article
the covid
show examples
pandemic, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of individuals who followed basic guidelines and did not affect by
Add an article
a corona
show examples
corona virus
Correct your spelling
coronavirus
show examples
.
Lastly
, I believe that
Correct article usage
a doctors
show examples
doctors
Change noun form
doctor's
show examples
check-up is only necessary
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
when
Correct article usage
the human-body
show examples
human-body
Correct your spelling
human body
show examples
cannot handle the pain. Agglomerating all points above elaborated, I opine that it
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
totally
depend
Correct subject-verb agreement
depends
show examples
on
situation
Add an article
the situation
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because
doctors
are more knowledgeable compared to a normal person.
Therefore
, I personally think that somewhere it is a negative development for mankind.
Submitted by rahulgpatel19 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: