The charts compare the ratio of water usage for different objectives in six sites of the world.

The charts compare the ratio of water usage for different objectives in six sites of the world.
The charts compare the ratio of
water
usage for different objectives in six sites of the world.
Overall
, in many parts of the globe,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
water
is mainly used for agricultural purposes. For the population of Central, Asia
water
serves as a source for agricultural development where almost 90
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
of
water
is used for
this
sector. Less aqua is consumed for domestic use (7%)
while
only a tiny fraction (5%) is used in
industrial
Add an article
the industrial
show examples
field. In comparison, in Africa, South East Asia, and South
America
agricultural area
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
account for 84%, 81%, and 71%, respectively.
However
, in South East Asia, in comparison to other mentioned areas, more liquid is spent by
industrial
Correct article usage
the industrial
show examples
sector
while
almost two times less
water
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
used by ordinary citizens. In Europe and North
America
, the situation is completely different. Almost
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of
water
Correct article usage
the water
show examples
in both areas
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
consumed by industrial field,
while
only 39% of
water
in North
America
and 32% in Europe
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
spent
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
agricultural goals. 13% of
water
in Europe and 15% in North
America
are used for domestic purposes.
Submitted by sanyashihova on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, america with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "compare" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "ratio" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "comparison" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: