Many parents complain that computer games have no value to their children's study. On the contrary, those online games have produced a lot of negative effects on their mental and physical development. What is your opinion?

Nowadays, technology is affecting many areas of our lives and the picture of
children
's daily life has changed. A Number of
youngers
Correct your spelling
youngsters
show examples
enjoy
games
, especially computer-based
games
and video
games
. Most of them play
this
entertainment almost every day. But their parents complain that computer
games
have no advantages for their kids. It is because they believe that computer
games
have no advantage to their
children
's education. I believe that online
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
show examples
produce
Correct subject-verb agreement
produces
show examples
a lot of harmful effects on mental and physical development and it is recognised
to
Change preposition
by
show examples
everybody as a myth. In my opinion, it is important for boys and girls to reduce playing
games
. Most of them do not finish their homework and play
games
.
This
situation will affect their educational development and
finally
, it may
give
Verb problem
apply
show examples
harm to developing mental and physical health. The parent's role is most important to solve
this
problem.
First,
they should remind them that playing it will harm their
children
. Most moms and dads give their phones and
PC
Fix the agreement mistake
PCs
show examples
to boys and girls when they are busy. youngers have no patience to control playing
games
and it will make them be an addict. To make a better situation, moms and dads can play for kids directly so that they
could
Verb problem
do
show examples
not think
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
show examples
are not
Verb problem
is
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the best option.
Second,
kids can remind themselves that they should play it after finishing their duties. It will allow them to be an alternative person and give achievable experiences.
As a result
, it is important for both parents and boys and girls to
remind
Verb problem
remember
show examples
that online
games
do not have big advantages for anything. Parents should take care of younger and
children
should increase their patience. Reminding it,
children
will be able to take both their mental and physical health.
Submitted by soominkim0618 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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