IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

In recent years, there has been a rise in the popularity of second-hand clothing amongst younger generations. Why is this happening? Do you think it’s a positive or negative development?

#years #rise #popularity #generations #it’s #development
In previous centuries, putting on used
clothes
 was the norm. Yet, it is definitely less popular
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
nowadays to wear
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
second
-hand
clothes
,
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
youngsters. As there are many reasons that let
people
 rethink
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
using
second
-hand
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
.
This
 article will discuss it thoroughly.
People
 tend to believe that
clothes
 reflect their state in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Accordingly
,
clothes
 became an important technique to impress
people
 and can be assumed as a
first
 communication tool and ice-breaker with strangers.
However
, good quality
clothes
 and brands became quite expensive
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
 for the new generations
were
Correct your spelling
where
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 earn less money and
keen
Add a missing verb
are keen
show examples
 to show off their superb
cloths
Correct your spelling
clothes
show examples
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society and
surronders
Correct your spelling
surrenders
.
This
 situation drives more younger
people
 to consider
second
-hand
clothes
 as long as nobody knows it was previously owned. While
consume
Change the verb form
consuming
show examples
 used items is better for the environment and can be considered the best way to
recycling
Wrong verb form
recycle
show examples
. many
people
 are reluctant to switch to
this
 kind of clothing.
people
 think about themself and their own self
estem
Correct your spelling
esteem
 before anything else.
thus
, it is quite hard for them to accept
such
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
 change in their
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
.
On the other hand
, many other
people
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
are less
vulnarable
Correct your spelling
vulnerable
 and can accept previously-owned items without shaking their
self confidence
Add a hyphen
self-confidence
show examples
. In conclusion. I think that
used
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
clothscloths
Correct your spelling
cloths cloths
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 a good impact on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. simply
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
show examples
 the
wastes
Fix the agreement mistake
waste
show examples
 and it is
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
best known
Add a hyphen
best-known
show examples
 recycling method for old and outdated fashion as long as it is in
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
excellent condition.
On the other hand
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
second
-hand
clothes
 reduce the living cost in some families specifically in very poor societies.
Submitted by w on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Sustainability
  • Carbon footprint
  • Pre-owned garments
  • Affordable
  • Vintage
  • Mainstream
  • Mass-produced
  • Online marketplaces
  • Self-expression
  • Recycling
  • Consumption model
  • Hygiene issues
  • Counterfeit products
  • Cultural shift
  • Materialism
What to do next:
Look at other essays: