When new towns are planned, it is essential to build more public parks or sports facilities than shopping complexes. Do you agree or disagree with statement?

#towns #parks #sports #facilities #complexes

Construction of

latest

Correct article usage

the latest

show examples

areas involve the necessity of making physical fitness area and

play ground

Correct your spelling

playground

show examples

as compared to shopping malls. I completely agree with

this

opinion. There are numerous reasons why public parks and

sports

facilities are important to be included. Healthy

people

stimulates

Correct subject-verb agreement

stimulate

show examples

the growth of a developed nation. Proper fitness area provides

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

generation to do some physical activities, and help them to be fit and strong which

also

leads them to explore their talent, and in

future

Add a comma

,future

show examples

they can become a

sports

person. What is more, they can earn

name

Correct article usage

a name

show examples

and fame by participating in

sports

competition

Fix the agreement mistake

competitions

show examples

Furthermore

, children

as well as old

Add the comma(s)

, as well as old people,

show examples

people

can take benefit by playing games with their companions and

Wrong verb form

doing

show examples

some yoga with their age mates respectively.

This

helps them to become more socialise and have fun in their life.

Consequently

, both parks and amenities related to fitness played an indispensable role in both

young

Correct article usage

the young

show examples

and old

generation

Fix the agreement mistake

generations

show examples

. Some

people

however

, might argue that shopping complexes have

significant

Add an article

a significant

show examples

role in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

society. These days,

people

are well aware of the latest trends with

discount

Fix the agreement mistake

discounts

show examples

and offers related to products. They have a craze to follow

tha

Correct your spelling

the

new fashion and buy the items according to their choice. If shopping stores are available in their area

then

they do not have

such

kind of need to travel to other locations to purchase things of their interest which in turn save their money and time.

Also

, it

give

Change the verb form

gives

show examples

them pleasure and they can be satisfied with their living locations.

For instance

Metropolitian

Correct your spelling

Metropolitan

cities offer all the trendy products so citizens of that location do not

travelled

Change the verb form

travel

show examples

to other

place

Fix the agreement mistake

places

show examples

and enjoy the weekend. In conclusion,

although

some

people

are in favour to build shopping stores

but

Remove the conjunction

apply

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

firmly believe that playgrounds and

sports

facilites

Correct your spelling

facilities

are far

important

Correct quantifier usage

more important

show examples

for a healthy and wealthy country.

Submitted by lovishhhh on Tue Dec 27 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

308 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4
band
Some people think that exercise is the key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion
In this contemporary era, people spend busy life. Then maintain good helathy is challenged. Soke claim that exercise is the best way to stay healthy. While others point out that a balanced diet is more essential. I strongly agree with both of argument. Nonetheless, in this essay I will discuss both views in upcoming paragraphs.
7
band
A local company is looking for people to do part-time work. You would like to work at the company in summer. Write a letter to the company manager. In your letter:•explain why you want to work there•say why you think you would be suitable for this work•give details of when you would be free to workWrite at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing in regard to your vacancy for a sales representative, as advertised on the store's website.
4.5
band
Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Emerging disease is a complex matter as it IS caused by various reasons. If disease control is taken lightly, it would cause a bigger catastrophe, such as AN epidemic or even A pandemic. I side with some people who believe ABOUT the importance of government to manage the root cause of emerging disease, including manmade hazardS like pollutions and housing problems. This will be proven by discussing various airborne disease in a packed neighbourhood, as well as comparing the illness trends between village and city.
5
band
Some people think living in big cities is bad for people's health. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
Big city life dramatically affects our health, mainly due to the air pollution and different lifestyles compared to rural areas. Based on my experience of living in 3 different cities I support that idea.
5
band
Some think spending a lot on birthday celebration and weddings is a waste of money. Others think that it is important for young people and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
My interest in studying the ‘Graduate Diploma of Public Health’ at Torrens University comes from different reasons. First of all, the role of Public Health is crucial to manage and control healthcare systems as well as introduce health promotion and disease prevention policies. Secondly, it is required to dive deeper into healthcare research implementing public health techniques to implement precise methodologies and accurate results.

When new towns are planned, it is essential to build more public parks or sports facilities than shopping complexes. Do you agree or disagree with statement?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that exercise is the key to health, while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

Some people say that to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus more on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think living in big cities is bad for people's health. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Some think spending a lot on birthday celebration and weddings is a waste of money. Others think that it is important for young people and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.