IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In Britain ,when someone gets pld,they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them.Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay? Give your reasons ?

#britain #someone #pld #home #people #nurses #government #care
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In
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 country like
united
Correct article usage
the united
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 kingdom, it is very common that senior citizens
live
Fix the infinitive
to live
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at
Change preposition
in
show examples
care
Use synonyms
 homes,as the youngsters are busy with their work life,here we can discuss
about
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
itwith
Correct your spelling
it with
with
 the
resons
Correct your spelling
reasons
. older people live along with peers at old age
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
 so that they have company to share
the
Change the word
their
show examples
thouts
Correct your spelling
thoughts
 and
care
Use synonyms
each
Change preposition
for each
show examples
 other
when ever
Correct your spelling
whenever
show examples
 required.
Now days
Correct the word
Nowadays
show examples
 younger family
memebers
Correct your spelling
members
 are busy with their work and studies,
hence
Linking Words
 parents think that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
they do not
want
Add the particle
towant
show examples
 give
burden
Correct article usage
a burden
show examples
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 them,they prefer to live away from the family.
For
Linking Words
Example
Add a comma
,Example
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 if parents are at home need to give attention
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 them,
some
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 it is not possible for their children when they are working. when growing older ,
activitis
Correct your spelling
activities
 slow down, health issues may
occure
Correct your spelling
occur
occurs
,
Correct word choice
and expances
show examples
expances
Correct your spelling
expanses
expenses
 of medical needs are so high ,some families may not be capable of spend on it,during their
employeement
Correct your spelling
employment
time
Use synonyms
 they might have paid
insurence
Correct your spelling
insurance
,and they have
payed
Correct your spelling
paid
show examples
 the tax to the
governament
Correct your spelling
government
andserved
Correct your spelling
and served
 to the company for their
life
Correct your spelling
lifetime
show examples
time
Use synonyms
,so it is
governament
Correct your spelling
government
 responsible to pay and taking
care
Use synonyms
 of senior citizens in the country and
also
Linking Words
 hairing the nurses for
further
Linking Words
care
Use synonyms
 management at
care
Use synonyms
 homes.
for Example
Linking Words
 if a person worked he would
paid
Change the verb form
pay
show examples
 for provident fund and
insurence
Correct your spelling
insurance
 as well it will be help full in his later age and after
retairment
Correct your spelling
retirement
 of his career . In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
seniour
Correct your spelling
senior
 citizens live in
Use synonyms
care
Add an article
a care
the care
show examples
home
Fix the agreement mistake
homes
show examples
 to reduce
burden
Add an article
the burden
show examples
 on
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 families and like to live peacefully with their peers,and
also
Linking Words
utilizing
Wrong verb form
utilise
show examples
 the
governament
Correct your spelling
government
 as paid taxes in their
life
Correct your spelling
lifetime
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 .
Submitted by karuna.mk220 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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