IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Since most information about culture and history can be found on the internet, museum are not needed anymore.To what extent do you agree?

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It is commonly accepted that comprehensive details of
culture
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 and
history
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 are available in
ciber
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cyber
 space to the extent that the existence of
museums
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are
Change the verb form
is
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 nullified. I strongly disagree with
this
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 opinion due to
following
Correct article usage
the following
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 reasons.
Firstly
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,
museums
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 allow spectators to
experience
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history
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 and
culture
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 by walking through them.
Secon
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Second
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 of all, it opens opportunities for
further
Linking Words
 research by allowing studies on actual specimens.
Therefore
Linking Words
, virtual
information
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 on
history
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 and
culture
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in
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on
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 the internet could not replace the function of a museum.
Museums
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 store vast
ammiunt
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amount
amounts
 of
information
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 on
history
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 and
culture
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 in the way of
artifacts
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artefacts
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, fossils, and dummies.
Public
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The public
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 can visit a museum and look at the display items in
real time
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real-time
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 and
experience
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 them. For
an
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apply
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example, in some
museums
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, visitors can wear replicas of ancient clothing items and taste similar cuisines at the premises to make the
experience
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 more alive.
Furthermore
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, scholars who are interested in
further
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 studying a specific specimen can request
for
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apply
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such
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endeavors
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endeavours
show examples
.
For example
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, fossils are being continuously studied with carbon dating methods to calculate their age. Not only that but
also
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such
Linking Words
 studies continue to discover new
information
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 about their geographical location, food pattern and other related species ext. In
summery
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summary
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,
museums
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 provide
real-time
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a real-time
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experience
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 of
history
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 and
culture
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, and open opportunities for more studies
oppose
Correct word choice
as oppose
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 to virtual facts available online via
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
. Simply,
museums
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 keep
history
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 and
culture
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 alive by allowing the audience to have actual
experience
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in
Change preposition
with
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 specimens.
Hence
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, I strongly believe
museums
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 are irreplaceable as
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
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 of
museums
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 outweigh the vast amount of
information
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 available
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the internet regarding
history
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 and
culture
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.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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