IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

computers are becoming an essential part of school. what is the advantage and disadvantage? what is your opinion?

#computers #part #school #advantage
In recent years,
computers
 have become a mandatory part of the educational system. While many people believe
this
 situation is beneficial for children's development, others argue that there are disadvantages to it. I strongly believe that using
computers
 in
education
 is an advantage. In
this
 essay, I will discuss both points of view and give my opinion.
To begin
 with, technological advancement, including the usage of
computers
 in
education
, has already made our lives more efficient.
Computers
 in schools have many benefits that enhance the quality of
education
 itself.
For example
, a teacher can easily explain a subject about food chains by playing a video of a lion chasing a deer.
Moreover
, by using
computers
 in the process of learning, schools can reduce the usage of paper.
In addition
,
computers
also
 help students to learn something easier and faster by accessing the internet. They can gather information from all around the world with just one click away.
On the other hand
, technology can affect students' health when spending too much time on it.
This
 is because the monitor's
computers
 will emit harmful rays that could hurt their eyes.
Furthermore
, addiction to
computers
 could have a very negative impact on the mental health of children. In conclusion,
although
 there are disadvantages to
computers
, it has many positives benefit,
such
 as assisting the learning process in school and helping children to understand the subject faster. In my opinion, the advantages of using
computers
 in
education
 play a vital role to reach information for the kids.
Submitted by rifqiadityariadhi on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: