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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

some people believe that if people are not allowed to work after the age of 60, it cause problems. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #work #age
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The phenomenon of the problems triggered by high-age flok not being allowed to
work
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 has aroused wide concern among various circles. Divergent as people's views on
this
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 issue in question may be, I totally disagree that elderlies cannot get the opportunity of evaluating their abilities fairly. Of all the reasons why communities should allow high-age flok to
work
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, probably the most significant one is that most of them hope to
work
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. Many people are boring after retiring because a myriad of reasons, some are not having any hobbies, some are not having friends, etc... There is a survey result that shows humans have a higher risk of getting sick if they are nothing to do.
Therefore
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, if their ability is qualified with companies' employment standards and there are no other candidates, companies should hire them. Another reason that should not be overlooked is that it should be able to allow them to support their family financially. If they can be self-sufficient, it is undeniable that can release their family pressure.
For example
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, in Hong Kong, many old people rely primarily on family support for their livelihoods because the retirement fund and government aid money are too low to support decades of retired life.
As a result
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, elderlies should have the right to choose to
work
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 or not based on their situation. Under
this
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 line of thinking, It seems to me that allows the elderly to decide whether
work
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 can keep them healthy and reduce the responsibility of the younger generation.
Submitted by frankyimp on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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