IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today

#plans #show #park #first
The two maps show the features of Grange
Park
 in 1920 and today respectively. Overall, the scenery of the
park
 today is significantly different from a century ago.
However
, there are still some regions of the
park
 that retain the old look and old location. In 1920, there were three rose gardens in the same shape were located in the top-left corner and bottom-left corner of the
park
, and the right side of the Entrance on Arnold Avenue respectively. For today, except for the rose garden at the top-left area, the other two rose gardens are combined and moved to the centre of the
park
 where there was a fountain before.
In addition
, the seats were all along the
park
 wall in the
last
 century.
Nevertheless
, now the seats surround the new rose garden.
Moreover
, The stage for musicians is enlarged into an amphitheatre
that is
 used for concerts. At the right side of the top entrance, they built a cafe.
Next
 to it, a children's play area is built on the position of the pond that planted water flora in 1920.
Furthermore
, they build a new water feature at the bottom-right area of the
park
 after dismantling the glasshouse. And they constructed an entrance to an underground car
park
 on the right side of the water feature.
Submitted by odongua on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • recreational facilities
  • landscaping
  • naturalistic
  • amenities
  • formal gardens
  • ergonomic
  • symmetric designs
  • inclusive
  • accessible
  • accommodations
  • native plant species
  • societal changes
  • visitor services
  • community events
  • evolution
  • modern playgrounds
  • wildflower meadows
What to do next:
Look at other essays: