IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to work at a job you enjoy than to make a lot of money. Support your answer with specific reasons and examples.

#work #job #money #support
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In recent decades, it has been argued that satisfaction in workplaces is significantly more essential for individuals' lives than having a high annual salary. In my opinion, since a number of
people
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 over the world pursue work and life balance when they are seeking employment, the trend of acquiring a job of human beings has changed for a few years across the globe.
Thus
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, I strongly agree with the view
people
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 have to focus on job satisfaction than making a
lot
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 of
money
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Firstly
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, It cannot be denied we are living in an era in which epidemics and natural disasters are prevailing and worrying aspects of all
people
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's lives.
For example
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, Covid-19 took place in China and Snowstorms are happening in Canada. Because of these unexpected situations which cause a massive number of human beings to die,
people
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 are unquestionably considering the importance of getting along with family and relatives than spending the most time in a workplace even though it provides a
lot
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 of
money
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.
Secondly
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, it is true that
people
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 who have high incomes
such
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 as doctors are significantly struggling with difficulties to deal with workplace stresses and mental diseases which lead to short-term sustainability. British council prove that professionals who acquire a
lot
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 of
money
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 annually tend to quit their occupations more than workers who are satisfied with their professions regardless of the level of income. In conclusion, job satisfaction should be prioritised over making a
lot
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 of
money
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 when
people
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 are looking for an occupation as it comparatively helps workers to keep flexibility between work and social relationships with the family.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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