Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is increasing talk of a higher life expectancy for residents of many developed countries.

This

is due to developments in technology and medicine.

As a result

, there are calls for an increase in the retirement threshold. In my opinion,

this

is a good solution, but each situation should be considered individually. Many older workers choose to retire because they have massive

health

problems.

This

means that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

even if they wanted to stay and support the company, their state of

health

prevents them from performing their duties adequately. Which certainly translates into productivity and the results achieved by the company.

Thus

causing great hardship and pain to the person performing their tasks. The situation is

therefore

detrimental to both parties.

In contrast

, there are

also

people in very good

health

who want to continue working as long as it is possible. In doing so, they will not only develop their skills and maintain their good

health

, but

also

make a positive contribution to the country's economy. At the same time inspiring and

showing

Wrong verb form

shows

show examples

young people that anything is possible. It is important,

however

, to remember that the designated age does not define our

wellbeing

Correct your spelling

well-being

show examples

and ability to work. Some people may have the energy to keep working, while others at a similar age will not be able to take on any challenge. Of course,

this

also

depends on many other factors

such

as professional position, job title and salary.

However

, it should be possible to choose one's own time to retire. There are many elements that determine a person's specific situation.

As a result

, one should remember to consider it individually and choose the best possible option for both parties at the same time.

Submitted by nataliejakubowska on Wed Jan 04 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

284 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some say that because many people are living much longer, the age at which people retire from work should be raised considerably. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Better driver education for better driving habits is more effective than heavier punishments for driving offences. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

In many countries, children today have more freedom than they used to. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Some people think that in this modern world getting old is entirely bad. However, other people believe that the life of old people is much better now than it was in the past. Discuss both points and give your opinion.

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.