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Band 4

Some people who have been in prison are the best to talk to school students about the danger of committing a crime. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #prison #school #students #danger #crime
It is true to say that, talking with some people who have been in jail for a long time
are
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is
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best
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the best
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 way to school students about the threat of committing the offence. I definitely agree with
this
 situation that, it is the best idea to turn back children from a
crime
. One of the
cause
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causes
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 for using ex-prisoner to talk about the drawbacks of
crimes
 for teenagers is that they are familiar with the consequences of committing
crimes
 better than anyone else. They not only experienced
prison
 sentences themselves but
also
 saw life-sentence or execution for other prisoners.
Furthermore
, by talking about severe punishments, kids may understand clearly that every action has its drawbacks and they should be very careful about their effect
in
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on
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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society. From a psychological point of
view
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,view
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 the
ex-prisoner's
Correct your spelling
ex-prisoners
 talking about
results
Correct article usage
the results
show examples
 of
crimes
 deters youngsters from committing
crimes
.
However
, some people and I
also
 argue that longer
prison
 is not a practical solution because prisoner will live with other criminals which demotivate them and their character will not improve. One solution is that government can provide separate schooling means practical skills to those prisoners who want to improve their lives.Even though longer
prison
 generates fear
inthe
Correct your spelling
in the
 criminals' mind which discourage them from committing
the
Correct article usage
apply
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crime
 but proper education, job opportunities and knowledge of practical skills
is
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are
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 the better solution
instead
 of longer
prison
. To conclude, I reiterate my opinion that some people think that the best way to reduce
crime
 is to give longer
prison
 sentences. Others,
however
, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing
crime
. I absolutely agree with
this
 situation.
Submitted by asqar4997 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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