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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #health #sports #facilities #effect #measures
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It has been suggested by some individuals that to enhance public
health
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 the best method is the establishment of more
sports
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centres
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 and
facilities
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 whereas others argue that the growth of these places is not sufficient since other measures are needed. In
this
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 essay, I will outline both views and explain why I believe that other measurements should be taken into consideration as well as the growth of
facilities
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. On one hand, some
people
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 including me believe that there are other important
factors
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 affecting public
health
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 apart from the increase in
sports
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facilities
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.
First
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 of all, the most significant factor is
people
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's
diet
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. To be more precise, not having a balanced
diet
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,
such
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 as consuming fewer fruits and vegetables and eating junk food excessively, is three times more important than exercising. So the governments should encourage
people
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 to have a good
diet
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 rather than exercise.
This
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 is because a poor
diet
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 is the commencement of malnutrition and different diseases.
Secondly
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,
people
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 should sleep enough for at least 6 hours per day to have proper metabolism during the day which is one of the significant
factors
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 in being healthy.
Hence
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, if
people
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 do not care about their
diet
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 and not regulating their sleep, the community will not have healthy citizens as much as increasing numerous gyms and equipment,
On the other hand
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, there are some
people
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 who think that the growth of
sports
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facilities
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 is the key factor and is enough to improve public
health
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. They assume that the more governments establish gyms and
sports
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centres
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, the more
people
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 lead to a healthy lifestyle.
This
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 is probably because they believe that in
this
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 way, they can promote enthusiasm about registering in those
centres
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 among citizens and help society to have an active lifestyle while I would argue that having an interest in
sports
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 do not associate with increasing
sports
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 materials.
This
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 is because a passion for working out can increase by informing
people
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 about the importance of
health
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. All in all,
although
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 the establishment of
sports
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centres
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 is one of the
factors
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 for having a healthy life, to my view it is not enough if it does not combine with other
factors
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.
Submitted by z.rezayi1999 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
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