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Band 6

Many people today spend most of their free time watching TV series or movies instead of going out. Do you think this is right or wrong?

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Since the world developed, TV
series
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 and
Movies
Use synonyms
 play
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
significant
roles
Correct the article-noun agreement
role
show examples
 in human lives.
People
Use synonyms
 start watching
series
Use synonyms
 and
movies
Use synonyms
 rather than enjoying outside
activities
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will demonstrate both views. To commence, TV
series
Use synonyms
 and
Movies
Use synonyms
 are addictive hobbies, many
people
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 spend their free
time
Use synonyms
 on Netflix and
series
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, which can have a huge impact on health problems
such
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 as diabetes, cholesterol, and obesity.
Moreover
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, looking at the screen for a long period of
time
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 will lead to poor eyesight and
also
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 a chance to have a headache.
Furthermore
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, these
activities
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also
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 make many
people
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 introvert rather than
extrovert
Fix the agreement mistake
extroverts
show examples
.
This
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 is because, watching
series
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 and
movies
Use synonyms
 are
activities
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 that do alone, which can lead to a lack of socialising skills and hard to communicate with
people
Use synonyms
 in the real world.
On the other hand
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, TV
series
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 and
Movies
Use synonyms
 can reduce stress for many
people
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. Being part of a
series
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 or
movies
Use synonyms
 by watching them every day will make many
people
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 get relaxed after learning or working all day.
This
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 can reduce stress for many
people
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 and
also
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 prevent them from suicide. Another point is that going out
activities
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such
Linking Words
 as skateboarding and
sports
Use synonyms
 are famous
activities
Use synonyms
 that most
people
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 spend
time
Use synonyms
 on it. Playing
sports
Use synonyms
 with friends
such
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 as football and basketball can lead to good health.
This
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 is because most
people
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 are lazy to exercise alone,
sports
Use synonyms
 can cut out
this
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 problem because most
sports
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 need more than one
people
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 to play.
However
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, there is
also
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 a disadvantage to going out on
activities
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. Drugs and alcohol can be found around the world, and going outside and meeting friends can increase the chance of being a new alcoholic.
This
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 is because there is some peer pressure for new alcoholics to try drugs and alcohol, which can destroy and have a negative impact on their's life. In a nutshell, both of them have different pros and cons, I believe that doing both of the
activities
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 with a limited
time
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 and managing the
time
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 to spend in each activity will make many
people
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 gain the highest benefits from these two
activities
Use synonyms

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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