IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

#future #cars #buses #trucks #driverless #people #vehicles #passengers
In the future, all vehicles will not be used as much as before,
instead
,
people
 will travel like a passenger.
This
 essay displays that the
number
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
automatic vehicles will be increased significantly, which will change considerably our society.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
,Meanwhile
show examples
 these modifications will lead to some misunderstandings between
people
 who are used to
drive
Replace the word
driving
show examples
,
nevertheless
Add a comma
,nevertheless
show examples
 we’ll have more advantages. Nowadays, the automatic system is implemented more often in our lives. Even a big
number
 of cars, buses and trucks have several automatic functions. We might see a lot of drunk, tired drivers who don’t obey traffic laws,
also
Correct word choice
and also
show examples
 old
people
 who don’t have a proper reaction to an obstacle. All of these
people
 can make accidents, which can lead to an emotional impact
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 our lives. So, the desire to change the driver into a robotic one
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 will decrease noticeably traffic jams, and accidents. Meanwhile, several business companies would not need to hire drivers to transport their products
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
another countries
Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
show examples
, because the automatic pilot will be able to achieve
this
 task.
Although
 the prices for these types of cars would be enough high, the government should have helped
people
 to buy.
For instance
, the old vehicle can be changed to a new automatic one, and to pay extra money for a period of time. Due to that changes, a big
number
 of drivers who
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 used to
drive
Wrong verb form
driving
show examples
 will disagree, because automatic vehicles can break down faster, and repair services might be very expensive.
Also
, it might be necessary for
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
well-skilled
people
 who are able to repair these. So, it might be only one or
to
Correct your spelling
two
show examples
 services in the whole country, which make the way more difficult.
However
, the advantages of
driverless
Add a missing verb
being driverless
show examples
 will outweigh a lot of disadvantages, because our lives are much more important than a car. The
number
 of accidents will remarkably decrease, and
people
 will not be afraid anymore to walk on the streets or
travelling
Wrong verb form
travel
show examples
 by
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
car or bus. In a nutshell, the automatic system is the key
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 our success, so we need to improve it and
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
make it perfect.
Submitted by cristi.corceac on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • driverless vehicles
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • increased safety
  • reduced traffic congestion
  • improved efficiency
  • accessibility
  • disabled
  • elderly
  • job displacement
  • privacy concerns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: