Many people put their personal information online for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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In the modern world, it is undeniable that many people share their personal

information

Use synonyms

online for daily activities

such

Linking Words

as social networking and banking.

This

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trend has increased significantly

due to

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technological advancements. In

this

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essay, an attempt will be made to examine whether

this

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is a positive or negative development. One of the most apparent reasons is that sharing personal data online poses serious

risks

Use synonyms

to privacy and security. To illustrate, sensitive

information

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can be accessed or misused by hackers or organisations.

For instance

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, cybercriminals may steal personal details and use them for fraud or identity theft.

In addition

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, excessive sharing on social media can expose individuals to unwanted attention or even physical danger. These

risks

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demonstrate that the negative consequences can be severe. Another point that should not be overlooked is that sharing personal

information

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online does offer certain benefits. To clarify, it allows convenient access to services

such

Linking Words

as communication and financial transactions.

For example

Linking Words

, online banking enables users to transfer money and manage accounts easily.

However

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, these advantages are largely related to convenience rather than necessity, and they do not outweigh the potential

risks

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Therefore

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, the

overall

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impact remains negative. To recapitulate, it is evident that

while

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sharing personal

information

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online provides convenience, it

also

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creates serious privacy and security

risks

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Therefore

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, I believe that

this

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is largely a negative development, as the dangers often outweigh the benefits.

warawutwangphrom

Apr 28, 2026

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task response

For task response, add one more clear reason why this is bad, so your view feels stronger.

task response

For task response, explain your examples a bit more. Show exactly how people can be hurt by sharing data online.

coherence and cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, your ideas are in a clear order, but some link words feel a bit formal and repeated. Use simple links in a natural way.

coherence and cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, make the second body paragraph more balanced. First show the good side, then clearly show why the bad side is stronger.

task response

For task response, you answer the question clearly and give a clear opinion from start to end.

task response

For task response, your examples about hackers, fraud, and online banking are relevant to the topic.

coherence and cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, the essay has a clear four-part structure: introduction, two body paragraphs, and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, each paragraph has one main idea, which makes the essay easy to follow.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

232 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

convenience
cybercrimes
identity theft
financial fraud
enhanced social connectivity
dependence on technology
customised services
privacy concerns
data breaches
social networks
personal information
online platforms

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Many people put their personal information online for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some people say that it is possible for a country to be both economically successful and have a clean environment. Others disagree. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

An increasing number of people are preferring to eat fast food regularly, it causes a lot of heath issues. Some people think the only solution is to ban it completely. Do you agree or disagree?

You would like to apply for a full-time position at an international airport. Write to the human resource department and say. -What job you are interested in -Explain what you are currently doing -Why do you think you are best candidate for the job