Many people put their personal information online for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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In the modern world, it is undeniable that many people share their personal

information

Use synonyms

online for daily activities

such

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as social networking and banking.

This

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trend has grown rapidly

due to

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advances in digital technology. In

this

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essay, an attempt will be made to examine whether

this

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is a positive or negative development. On the one hand, there are some benefits associated with sharing personal

information

Use synonyms

online. One of the most apparent positive aspects is that it allows convenient and efficient access to services. To illustrate, individuals can communicate with others, manage finances, and complete transactions quickly through online platforms.

For instance

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, online banking enables users to transfer money and pay bills without visiting physical branches.

In addition

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, social media platforms help people stay connected with friends and family regardless of distance.

On the other hand

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, there are

also

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significant drawbacks related to

this

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trend that should not be overlooked. One negative aspect is the risk to privacy and security. To clarify, personal data can be misused by hackers or organisations, leading to identity theft or financial loss.

For example

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, cybercriminals may access sensitive

information

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and use it for fraudulent activities.

Furthermore

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, excessive sharing of personal details may expose individuals to unwanted attention or social risks, which can negatively affect their safety and well-being. To recapitulate, it is evident that sharing personal

information

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online offers convenience and connectivity,

while

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the main drawbacks include serious privacy and security risks. Having considered both sides thoroughly, I have personally come to believe that

this

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is largely a negative development, as the potential dangers often outweigh the benefits.

warawutwangphrom

Apr 28, 2026

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task response

Say your opinion more early in the intro, not only at the end.

task response

Add one more clear reason for why it is mostly negative.

task response

Use more direct examples, not only general ones.

coherence and cohesion

Link your ideas with a clearer line, so each body part clearly leads to your final view.

coherence and cohesion

Some topic lines are a bit repeated. Try to make each paragraph have one strong main idea.

coherence and cohesion

Use simple linking words in a natural way, and do not overuse set phrases.

task response

You answered both sides of the question and gave a clear final opinion.

task response

Your ideas are easy to understand and mostly stay on topic.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear intro, two body parts, and a clear end.

coherence and cohesion

You use linking words well, so the essay is easy to follow.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

264 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

convenience
cybercrimes
identity theft
financial fraud
enhanced social connectivity
dependence on technology
customised services
privacy concerns
data breaches
social networks
personal information
online platforms

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Many people put their personal information online for everyday activities such as socializing on social networks or banking purposes. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Stress is now a major problem in many countries around the word. what are the causes of it? and what solution do you offer?

These days, more and more business meetings are taking place online. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

Mobile phones and the internet could have many benefits for older adults. However, this age group uses technology the least. What are the benefits for older adults of using mobile phones and the internet? How can we encourage them to use this new technology?

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people prefer to travel around town by car, while others prefer public transit such as bus, train, or subway. Discuss both these positions and give your own opinion.