IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Internet technology means people do not need to travel to foreign countries to understand how others live. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#internet #technology #people #travel #countries
In
this
 modern era, artificial intelligence
change
Change the verb form
changes
show examples
 everything certainly and individuals modify their techniques to achieve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information from various ways
such
 as
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
. Few pupils,
claims
Correct subject-verb agreement
claim
show examples
 that they do not need to travel to
another countries
Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
show examples
 for understanding their culture and traditions because they access
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information from
this
 trend. In my opinion, the position of technology appears to be more rational. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 we will
further
 elaborate
my
Change preposition
on my
show examples
 views for favouring the
postive
Correct your spelling
positive
impact of
this
 trend and
thus
 will lead to a logical conclusion. To commence with, the
first
 and foremost reason is that social media apps
such
 as Youtube,
Google
Correct word choice
and Google
show examples
 are
Add an article
a source
the source
show examples
source
Fix the agreement mistake
sources
show examples
 of wisdom, individuals need to click the button and minute to huge knowledge is available
with in
Correct your spelling
within
show examples
 a
second
. Another pivotal
aspects
Replace the adjective
aspect
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 is that internet technology is a cost savings system which
is save
Change the verb form
saves
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 valuable money
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
learner
Fix the agreement mistake
learners
show examples
 who
want
Change the verb form
wants
show examples
 to
be spend
Change the verb form
spend
show examples
massive
Add an article
a massive
show examples
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
 on
exploration
Add an article
an exploration
the exploration
show examples
 of
nation
Add an article
the nation
a nation
show examples
. Categorically discussing, it cannot be ignored that the main reason behind
this
 is that people share their traditions and activities on
virtual
Add an article
a virtual
show examples
 streaming
app
Fix the agreement mistake
apps
show examples
 like WhatsApp or Facebook which is amiable for youngsters or toddlers. Probing ahead, one
or
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
 the main underlying reason stem from the fact is that it is convenient and eco-friendly it
is create
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creates
show examples
 zero
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 pollution and
easy
Add a missing verb
is easy
show examples
 to access for every age
groups
Fix the agreement mistake
group
show examples
. Moving
further
, it is pertinent to mention that due to
pandemic
Correct article usage
the pandemic
show examples
 it is not safe to travel
another
Change preposition
to another
show examples
 region because it is hazardous for life.
Moreover
, because of precious time, it is not
considerable
Replace the word
considered
show examples
 to waste time on
such
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
things. Apart from the reasons
mention
Change the form of the verb
mentioned
show examples
 above it can be clearly stated why many are in favour of
this
 trend. In conclusion, according to the argument aforementioned above , one can reach
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
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 conclusion that the
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
 of internet technology are indeed too great.
Submitted by naffey07 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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