Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. With out the success of career, life will become meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#people #work #people’s #life #success #career

I partly agree. In my opinion,

work

is an essential thing in

people

’s lives, but

life

would not be meaningless due to not succeeding in a career. There could have some other things making

people

’s lifetime complete. In human society, finding jobs is the thing that most individuals would do since they graduated from school. As

work

people

’s income source, most workers are hustling for better positions in their jobs because the higher their success in their career, the better quality of

life

they could have.

For example

, the salary of the medium or lower levels employees may only support their daily

life

By contrast

, managers or CEOs could gain more profits in their business and have a better quality of

life

Thus

work

is an important thing

people

need to have.

However

, without a successful career,

life

could still have meaning for

people

. Not all

people

are willing to put extra effort into their job, they believe other things in

life

are

also

important.

For instance

, cultivating their hobbies, using more time to accompany their family, or even experiencing different

life

are making these individuals’

life

happy. These

people

may not have a high position in their occupations but compared with other peers who are more concentrated on

work

, they are more enjoy their

life

. In conclusion,

work

is necessary for

people

to survive in

this

society, but could not be the only important thing into which they need to put enormous energy.

Nevertheless

, there are lots of things that could make a person’s

life

become meaningful.

Submitted by doud99697 on Sat Jan 07 2023

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

259 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that work is the most important thing of people’s life. With out the success of career, life will become meaningless. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

In many parts of the world, people rely on private cars for transportation. In what ways does reliance on private cars affect the way we live? Do the effects tend to be positive or negative?

In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?

Global warming is one of the biggest threats humans face in the 21st Century, and sea levels continue to rise at alarming rates. What problems are associated with this, and what are some possible solutions?