Nowadays there are more opportunities for women than there were in the past. Some people think this situation has caused more problems than it has solved. What are your opinions on this?

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Today females have more opportunities than it was in
ancient
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the ancient
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world. Now they can study at school ,
university
Correct word choice
or university
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than
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then
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take part in voting etc. Many individuals feel that
this
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scenario has given more issues than correcting
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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.
However
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, I strongly disagree with
this
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statement
Firstly
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, nowadays we have many already educated
women
Use synonyms
and many girls studying at schools and universities.
As a result
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, educated and clever people are increasing in our society.
That is
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mean our economy ,
household
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households
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,
government
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and government
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will become
batter
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better
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and stronger .
In Addition
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,
new
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a new
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invention
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inventions
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will appear frequently just because of the fact that around 40% are
female
Add an article
a female
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scientist
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scientists
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.
Secondly
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, now girls can choose
the
Change the word
their
show examples
role and decide
who
Change the pronoun
whom
show examples
they want to be.
For instance
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,
on
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in
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the 18 century in
England
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,England
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a
Correct the article-noun agreement
women
a woman
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women
Use synonyms
could be only a housewife.
However
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, today ladies can work out
they
Correct word choice
if they
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want to have
family
Correct article usage
a family
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and take care of
her
Correct pronoun usage
their
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family or
she
Correct pronoun usage
they
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want to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
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single independent
Use synonyms
women
Correct the article-noun agreement
woman
show examples
and make
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
successful
career
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careers
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.
Furthermore
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, females
in
Add a missing verb
are in
show examples
many ways more gifted than males.
For example
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, in cooking , painting ,
in
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apply
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medicine etc.
Accordingly
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more
jubs
Correct your spelling
jobs
now taking by them so, they
also
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become the source of money and stabilities
of
Change preposition
for
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theire
Correct your spelling
their
families. Personally, I am happy that now
women
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can do what they want and nowadays they have already broken
myth
Correct article usage
the myth
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that
women
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are weak gender. In conclusion, the variety of opportunities for
women
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improve
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improves
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our world and
modify
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modifies
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out
Correct your spelling
our
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society to more equality, and
harmonious
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harmony
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.
However
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, we men do not need to forget that we need to help , support and encourage our wives , girlfriends , friends, sisters, mums etc.
Submitted by tolik.sm.id on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • gender equality
  • social justice
  • economic development
  • innovation
  • traditional family roles
  • shared responsibilities
  • diverse perspectives
  • creativity
  • decision-making
  • educational opportunities
  • work-life balance
  • traditionalists
  • societal friction
  • gender roles
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