You have bought a toy online. On delivery, you found that it has some issues. Write a letter to the manager of the toy company and express your dissatisfaction. In your letter: Give details of the toy you have purchased. Tell them why you think the toy is faulty. What do you want the comapny to do about that.

#toy #delivery #manager #company #dissatisfaction #comapny

Dear Sir/Madam, I am writing

this

letter in accordance

Change preposition

with

show examples

the poor

product

quality of the new HotWheels RC-Car toy. I

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

purchased the toy from your website on

January

1st 2023. My order number is

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

1123456. I

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

received the

package

January

6th 2023. As my nephew's birthday is coming up later in

the

Change the article

apply

show examples

January

I was browsing the internet for a new toy to buy for his 10th birthday. I found your HotWheels RC-Car on your website stated as a brand new line of Remote Controlled(RC)

car

Fix the agreement mistake

cars

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that was introduced by your company in September 2022. My

newphew

Correct your spelling

nephew

loves racing cars and due to the reputation of HotWheels as a recognizable

brand

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,brand

show examples

I decided to purchase the

product

. Upon receiving the

package

January

6th, I immediately suspected the betterment of the

product

due to the entire

package

being in a mangled state. I opened the

package

and noticed the remote control was damaged and the antenna was shattered

Change preposition

into

show examples

multiple pieces. I tried starting the car but it was not responding at all. As my

product

is still under the return

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

warranty, I would like to get a replacement for the broken remote control. Due to my nephew's birthday approaching quickly - 23rd

January

, I would appreciate

Correct pronoun usage

it if

show examples

I can

have

Add the particle

tohave

show examples

expedite

Wrong verb form

expedited

show examples

shipping and still be able to gift it on time. Hope to resolve

this

issue soon. Yours sincerely,

Samvid

Correct your spelling

David

Jhaveri

Submitted by samvid95 on Wed Jan 11 2023

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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1Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

237 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and have health problems as a result. Why do so many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about this problem?

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Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?