Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Nowadays, people are too obsessed with buying or acquiring material things such as expensive clothes or cars because, they think that people around them will judge them based on what they possess.

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Many and many

people

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are focused on their image in society. They try to buy expensive stuff

such

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as trendy

clothes

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or luxury cars because their priority is society's

opinion

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of them.

However

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, is it a reality for the majority of the

people

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? On the one hand, young

people

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are more obsessed with other's

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opinion

Fix the agreement mistake

opinions

show examples

so they try to buy fashionable, designed

clothes

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to look cool. It happens because a big number of individuals want to create a rich personal image.

For instance

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, some

people

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rent a luxury car to look cool in the eyes of their friends, despite the fact that they can not afford

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this expensive vehicles

Change the determiner

this expensive vehicle

these expensive vehicles

show examples

Moreover

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, many individuals prepare to loan

money

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from the bank only because they want to be cool.

On the other hand

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, there are numerous smart

people

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who think rationally so they do not care about others.

This

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type of individual has high self-esteem so they do not need expensive goods to create a positive

opinion

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of somebody.

For example

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, billionaires

such

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as Mark Zuckerberg wear simple, comfortable

clothes

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because they do not care about others'

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opinion

Fix the agreement mistake

opinions

show examples

and are focused on their own comfort.

Furthermore

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, they know how to invest

money

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accurately so buying

clothes

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or luxury cars has no sense for them because they will better invest

this

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money

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and afterwards will have revenues from it. To sum up, in my

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opinion

Add a comma

,opinion

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many

people

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are focused on their looks so I fully agree with

this

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statement because they try to buy trendy goods and are prepared to loan

money

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for it.

dominikskorbusWed Jan 11 2023

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

material wealth
social media influence
advertising
high-end products
better lifestyle
peer pressure
societal norms
luxury items
financial strain
personal growth
temporary satisfaction
long-term happiness
fulfillment

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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Nowadays, people are too obsessed with buying or acquiring material things such as expensive clothes or cars because, they think that people around them will judge them based on what they possess.

Your opinion

Some people believe that money is the most important factor for achiveing happiness. However, others believe that happiness has nothing to do with money. Discuss both views abd give your opinion.

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

Some people get into debt buying things they don’t need and can’t ‎afford.What are the reasons for this behaviour?What action can be taken ‎to prevent people having this problem?

Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others believe actions can be taken to bring about a change.