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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In many countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more widely available. Do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advantages?

#countries #food #outweigh
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In many countries, fast
food
Use synonyms
 is becoming cheaper and more widely available. Do the disadvantages of
this
Linking Words
 outweigh the advantages? In
this
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 digital era, there has been an increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
availability
Correct article usage
the availability
show examples
 of fast
food
Use synonyms
 and it becomes more economical for
people
Use synonyms
 in some countries. I hold a firm belief that
this
Linking Words
 trend may have both positive and negative
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
 in equal measure. In
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of
positive
Add an article
the positive
show examples
 side of Reducing
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
 and widening the
variation
Replace the word
variety
show examples
 of fast
food
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, it will allow
people
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 to save far more time and try different kinds of
food
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.
People
Use synonyms
 will be more attracted
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 cheaper and tasty
food
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, and most of them probably fancy ordering fast
food
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of cooking.
Therefore
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, individuals, especially in a metropolitan city, can save
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
time and enjoy their
meal
Fix the agreement mistake
meals
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 practically.
In addition
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, it helps the merchandise to promote their products. There are ubiquitously fast
food
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 exists today, and the selling of
food
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 will be more competitive. In
this
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 way, reducing the price and serving more variety of
food
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, can
be help
Change the verb form
help
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 to promote the
food
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 for
Add an article
the merchant
a merchant
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merchant
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merchants
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. In another hand, rampant cheaper fast
food
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 in some countries can lead
people
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 to reduce their
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 in cooking.
For instance
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, a mother back in the day taught her daughter how to make homemade
food
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 but now, most mothers are indulged by ordering fast
food
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 and they may not teach their
daughter
Fix the agreement mistake
daughters
show examples
 for preparing
food
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.
Additionally
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,
people
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 will forget the sense of cooking and preparing
indregien
Correct your spelling
in region
 of
food
Use synonyms
 with their family. In the past cooking together was a tradition for bonding one family member to others but nowadays they are having lack
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
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 sense which is becoming less and less. In conclusion, making fast
food
Use synonyms
 becoming cheap and various has some benefits which are
people
Use synonyms
 can effectively save their time and try various
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
 of
food
Use synonyms
. It is
also
Linking Words
 can be a promotion for some
merchant
Fix the agreement mistake
merchants
show examples
.
However
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, in
term
Fix the agreement mistake
terms
show examples
 of
negative
Add an article
the negative
show examples
 side of
this
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 case,
this
Linking Words
 trend can reduce
skill
Correct article usage
the skill
show examples
 of cooking and
reducing
Wrong verb form
reduce
show examples
feel
Add an article
the feel
show examples
 of cooking together with
family
Correct article usage
a family
show examples
.
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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