Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #products #level #sugars #health #people #sugar

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there is no doubt that these days there are a lot of high levels of

sugar

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in many

products

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. the question is is it a good way to make sugary food and drinks more expensive to make society eat

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

sugar

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?. in

this

Linking Words

essay I am going to talk about it and give my opinion on the matter.

to begin

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with,

sugar

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is an important source of energy for the human body.

However

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, eating a lot of

sugar

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can harm more than good. I agree with making the

products

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more expensive to encourage

people

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to eat less of them. But I think there are many ways to convince

people

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to eat less

sugar

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and be healthier.

For instance

Linking Words

, make more advertisements about the diseases that

sugar

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can do.

Also

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, writing about it in social media because social media becoming so effective nowadays for

people

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. Reminding young

people

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and kids about the serious damage that sugary can made is a very important way.

Moreover

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, making

sugar

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products

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more expensive going really makes our behaviours

Change preposition

apply

show examples

shopping better. How?,

for example

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, if I see healthy

products

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cheaper than any other one I am going to buy for sure healthy food. Day after day it will make me love food with less

sugar

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and improve my health and my brain. to sum up, it is a good idea to make

sugar

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products

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more expensive to encourage society to eat less

sugar

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However

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, is better to make

people

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and especially our kids about what

sugar

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will do to their bodies and brain.

Submitted by Shaima alrahbi on Thu Jan 12 2023

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion. (rewrite)

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One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is that Governments impose extra taxes on flights to restrict tourism industry. It is undeniable that tourism has become an essential part of our life.

MANY PEOPLE WHO CARE FOR THE ELDERLY DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO LOOK AFTER THEM. WHAT ARE THE PROBLEMS RELATED TO THIS? WHAT ARE SOME POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS?