IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some believe that charitable organisations should help people no matter where they live. Others argue that charities should only help those living in the country where the charity is based. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#believe #organisations #people #matter #charities #country #charity
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According to
 some individuals,
charities
 should help only those
people
 who live within their national boundaries;
however
, others opine that they should provide assistance everywhere. In my opinion, it depends on the mission of the organization and its
resources
. Well-funded
charities
 can offer help everywhere; those
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
 are short of
resources
 should prioritize their own
people
. On the one hand, if NGOs decide to serve only the
people
 of their country, we cannot quite blame them. After all, their
resources
 come from the local
people
 and as
such
 when
this
 money is utilized for the benefit of the locals, it is fully justified. Charitable work focusing on local issues
also
 satisfies donors who are eager to see a resolution to the problems affecting their country or community.
Also
, many charitable organizations have limited
resources
.
For example
,
charities
 operating in poor countries are often short of
resources
. They cannot provide help abroad. If they attempt to do
this
, they will only antagonize the local community that funds their initiatives.
On the other hand
, there are many international organizations flush with cash and other
resources
.
For instance
, UNICEF is an international organization which aims to aid children worldwide. They receive funding from affluent countries and
hence
 they are quite capable of offering assistance in any part of the world. There are several
such
 organizations that have the backing of developed countries. It is their moral and constitutional responsibility to provide assistance to needy
people
 everywhere.
To conclude
,
charities
 should work with the objective of helping the needy. Whom they should help or where they should provide help depends on their financial situation and objectives.
Submitted by vyshnavi.sathyan on

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task response
Provide balanced arguments for both views and justify your opinion clearly.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure is mostly coherent, but ensure that the progression of ideas is clear and easy to follow throughout the essay.
task response
Support each main point with specific examples and ensure that they are relevant to the discussion.
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