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Band 3

in many cities construction of new houses and office buildings is not controlled, and it leads to everybody building in whichever style they want without thinking about design. Do you agree that advantages outeeigh the disdvantages?

#cities #construction #houses #office #buildings #everybody #style #design #outeeigh #disdvantages
In many societies,
construction
Correct article usage
the construction
show examples
 of new houses and
buildings
 is not controlled by governments, and the
buildings
' styles
depends
Change the verb form
depend
show examples
 on
constructor's
Correct article usage
the constructor's
show examples
 mind. Because of that, in case of
buildings
, especially apartments and houses in
Republic
Correct article usage
the Republic
show examples
 of
Korea
 are
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
each
Change preposition
as each
show examples
 other. In my opinion, government and departments should force constructors that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
design
 and
construction
 of
buildings
 should be various. Most apartments in South
Korea
 are
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 so
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the atmosphere of the cities in South
Korea
 is boring. Present day in South
Korea
, major
construction
 companies
such
asSamsung
Correct your spelling
as Samsung
construction
 is making an effort to
design
 apartments more
variously
Replace the word
varied
show examples
. In
Singapore
, government and the ministry of
construction
forces
Fix the agreement mistake
force
show examples
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
constructors to build
buildings
 variously, so that the
design
Fix the agreement mistake
designs
show examples
 of
Singapore
's
buildings
 are different
each
Change preposition
from each
show examples
 other. Various
design
 leads
Singapore
's architecture quality
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
higher. More than
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
3.5 million
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
tourists are entering
Singapore
 each year to see Marina Bay Sands hotel,
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 fabulous building in the country.
Variety
Correct article usage
A variety
show examples
 of
design
Fix the agreement mistake
designs
show examples
 will lead cities to be famous for
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 atmosphere and residents will be happy to
expanded
Change the form of the verb
expand
show examples
 options to
choose
Wrong verb form
choosing
show examples
 their
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
 my occasion,
it
Correct pronoun usage
I
show examples
 was glad to choose my own house in various options for my apartment in Dongtan, Gyeongi-do.
Government
Correct article usage
The government
show examples
 forced constructors to provide
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 number of options to residents
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 so that residents can choose their own
house
Fix the agreement mistake
houses
show examples
. In conclusion, governments and departments should force to construct
buildings
variouly
Correct your spelling
variously
seriously
. It will increase the quality of architecture and gather visitors who are interested in architecture.
Submitted by soominkim0618 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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