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Writing Samples
Band 4

Nowadays, people are spending more time away form their homes, because they spend longer in their work place. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

#people #time #form #homes #work #place
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People are wasting the majority of their time at
work
except
Add the preposition
forexcept
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 their homes. In contemporary days. On my ,side people should regulate their time in their daily lives.
First
 of all, workers have rescheduled their day-to-day activities and they need to achieve the targets set for them. To do so , they have to extend beyond their shift timings and try to complete the
work
 assignment.
For instance
, meetings and other priority activities will make employees
work
 beyond office hours.
Likewise
, meetings are scheduled outside the regular job timings, they have to attend the same and receive the key information.
on the other hand
, if they start staying away from their family,
this
 will lead to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
disconnection among themselves and it will eventually end with miscommunications.
Therefore
,
this
 will have an adverse effect on the friendly environment at home and a lot of gaps will arise between parents, siblings etc.
Similarly
, after spending extended hours
at
Change preposition
in
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 the industry, they will feel tired and will not get enough space
take
Fix the infinitive
to take
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 rest after arriving at the house.
This
 will
also
 have a serve impact on health conditions as well. To conclude, Everyone should spend enough term with family as well as at
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
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, as both plays
vital
Correct article usage
a vital
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 role.
Such
 as,
Career
Correct article usage
a Career
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 should be considered
as
Change preposition
apply
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a priority, and at the same point equal importance should be given to the house members as well like, spending
quality
Correct article usage
a quality
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 life during weekends, festival times etc.
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • professional growth
  • networking opportunities
  • work-life imbalance
  • career advancement
  • burnout
  • strained relationships
  • physical and mental health risks
  • dedication
  • expertise
  • collaboration
What to do next:
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