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Writing Samples
Band 5

Nowadays, eating habits of people aroud the world are chaging causing them many health problem including obesity . Why do people tend to eat so badly? What can be done to improve their eating habits?

In recent years, the frequency and the
amount
Use synonyms
 of food that people eat have been increasing rapidly. These changings could lead people to experience
diet related
Add a hyphen
diet-related
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 diseases
such
Linking Words
 as obesity and diabetes. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
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 I will discuss the potential causes and solutions of
this
Linking Words
 event.
Firstly
Linking Words
, one of the key contributing factors to
obssesive
Correct your spelling
obsessive
 eating
habits
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 is the increased intake of sugary products. These days, the variety of foods rich in
sugar
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 including cakes, cookies and snacks is getting wider. It is known that frequent intake of simple carbohydrates
such
Linking Words
 as glucose, could lead people to
sugar
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 addiction same as nicotine and caffeine. If we eat a significant
amount
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 of sugary products frequently, we would become addicted to
sugar
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.
Consequently
Linking Words
, we will tend to eat foods more frequently which might alter our metabolism.
Secondly
Linking Words
, by simply reducing the
amount
Use synonyms
 of
sugar
Use synonyms
 intake we can improve our eating
habits
Use synonyms
. If we will get used to eating 3 main meals with less
amount
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 of carbohydrates a day, we would not face any unhealthy eating
habits
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.
In addition
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, eating more beneficial
sugar
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
fiber
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fibre
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 will lead us to
more
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a more
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 healthy balanced diet.
Hence
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, it prevents
from
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apply
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diseases
such
Linking Words
 as diabetes and
overweight
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being overweight
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. Controlling our frequency and being aware of advantageous
nutritions
Fix the agreement mistake
nutrition
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 will be the major solution to detrimental eating
habits
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
this
Linking Words
 essay has discussed excessive
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amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
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 of sugary products could be
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 impactful reason for increased eating
habits
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 and the main solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 situation could be
balanced
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a balanced
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 diet and reduced sugars in foods we eat every day.

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Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

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