Nowadays people use social media to keep in touch with others and be aware of the news. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

While some

people

opt to have a monotonous

life

and be resistant, others argue that change is more meaningful.

However

, I side with those who believe that having a dynamic one offers a number of benefits. On the one hand, it is sensible for

people

who leave their

life

unchanged for two reasons.

Firstly

, they have

Add an article

a more

show examples

stable and predictable

life

expectancy. If

this

condition is applied,

people

will feel happier and experience less stress towards their routines.

Thus

, they will remain in a steady

life

without worrying and feeling anxious.

Secondly

, stay put

Change preposition

show examples

their

life

people

will be avoided

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the risks of making different

choices

. Many

people

fell down after making speculative

choices

in their

life

Replace the word

lives

show examples

and took enormous effort to be backed in. Considering

this

however

, will reduce the chance to be in

the

Correct article usage

show examples

unwanted condition which occurred by making wrong decisions.

Therefore

, having

Remove the article

apply

show examples

less risk of

life

will enable

people

to be unchallenged

with

Change preposition

show examples

unprecedented

eventsevent

Correct your spelling

events event

and have a more predictable

life

On the other hand

, I argue that being agile with our

choices

life

is better as it follows two main reasons. Having more confidence in deciding

life

’s options will make

people

experience many beneficial moments.

For instance

, when

people

had decided to start a business over a regular job. The ups and downs

for

Change preposition

show examples

being an entrepreneur are the golden moments which benefit for

Remove the article

apply

show examples

prolonged success,

however

Add a comma

,however

show examples

it will not be encountered when being an employee.

Secondly

, having unprecedented

choices

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

will train

people

to be more aware of changes. As the adage says “change is the only permanent thing in

life

”,

therefore

, there are many truths,

useful

Correct word choice

and useful

show examples

experiences that will unfold and be useful for our future if we adapt in transition. In conclusion,

although

it seems interesting to have a monotonous

life

and refuse changes in our

life

, being more open to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

development and encouraging

life

experience is beneficial as it offers us golden moments in our future.

Submitted by athfand on Wed Jan 18 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

330 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Instant communication
Geographical separation
Vital sources
Global events
Networking opportunities
Interpersonal relationships
Digital interactions
Misinformation
Misiformed public opinions
Endanger
Excessive use
Addiction
Mental health
Anxiety
Depression
Loneliness

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Nowadays people use social media to keep in touch with others and be aware of the news. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, an increasing number of people are suffering from health problems as a result of eating too much fast food. It is, therefore, necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this?How can people research this?

Some people think that wearing uniforms fosters solidarity between staff and makes them feel part of a team. Others claim that it is better to have a dress code than a uniform. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be compulsory in high school programmes (for example, working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that individuals do no protect cannot make difference, others say that individuals can protect environment.Discuss both views and give your opinion.