Some people believe it is essential to include physical education classes in the curriculum for all school-age children. Others think that children's time is better spent on more academics subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people argue that it is important
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
growth
Replace the word
grow
show examples
.80 add physical
education
classes
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the curriculum for pupils, While others think that
children
's
time
is better spent on more
academical
Replace the word
academic
show examples
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
.
Although
, physical activities contribute
yo
Correct your spelling
to
show examples
being strong and
health
Replace the word
healthy
show examples
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
believe that it's more appropriate to spend school hours on more
academical
Replace the word
academic
show examples
subjects where essential knowledge
coud
Correct your spelling
could
be gained. On the one hand, adding
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
classes
contribute to
children
's health conditions and power. If pupils do sport at least at school, they might become much
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
stronger.
Moreover
,
schooles
Correct your spelling
schools
show examples
able to provide trainers, which are
are
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
proficient and rigorously
electived
Correct your spelling
elected
selected
electives
, and high-level gyms.
For example
, in Israel physical
education
lessons
are based
from
Change preposition
on
show examples
first
class
this
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
leads to
Correct article usage
an upwars
show examples
upwars
Correct your spelling
upward
upwards
trend of healthy residents. I,
however
, believe
this
approach may disrupt
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
academical
Replace the word
academic
show examples
lesson that plays
key
Add an article
a key
show examples
role in
pupil's
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils'
show examples
growth.
On the other hand
, more hours spent on
academical
Replace the word
academic
show examples
lessons
leads to wide-range
knowledge
Change preposition
of knowledge
show examples
about
world
Correct article usage
the world
show examples
and proficiency in
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
children
's field. Extending
time
which would be spent on
academical
Replace the word
academic
show examples
education
is
more
Correct article usage
a more
show examples
relevent
Correct your spelling
relevant
approach rather than expanding hours for physical
education
. Despite
this
Add a comma
,this
show examples
a lot of parents
also
wish more appropriate method for growing
children
. As an example, in Russia PE
classes
held
Add a missing verb
are held
show examples
once a week while other
time
spent
Add a missing verb
is spent
show examples
on
academical
Replace the word
academic
show examples
lessons
this
leads to
Russian's
Change noun form
Russian
show examples
pupils
Change noun form
pupils'
pupil's
show examples
vast understanding of world
princeples
Correct your spelling
principles
and wide-range knowledge. I think,
this
method is much better rather than extending
time
Add an article
the time
show examples
for PE
classes
. In conclusion, despite expanding
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
spent on physical
lessons
is good for health and power,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
think it would be much more
time
on
academical
Replace the word
academic
show examples
lessons
.
Submitted by prostoy.pacan4ek on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: