Nowadays many individuals work for long hours more than considering time for recreation. This issue has both benefits and drawbacks. I personally argue that disadvantages are more than advantages.

Nowadays many individuals
work
for long hours more than considering time for recreation.
This
issue has both benefits and drawbacks. I personally argue that disadvantages are more than advantages. There are some benefits to working more than having leisure pursuits.
Firstly
, people can
work
overtime to make more money in order to have high-quality entertainment even if it is too short. Take employees earning a high salary for extra
work
as an example; they can have better hobbies in their holiday. Another advantage might be getting a
job
promotion. People devoting themselves to companies are more likely to climb the career ladder since they will become more skilful. To take intern engineers in companies as an example, they
work
full-time even on the holiday and
then
become senior engineers after a period and may get a high-power
job
in the future.
Nevertheless
, there are
also
disadvantages. Those who are struggled with
work
more than leaving time for leisure interests decrease their spirit in life because their life becomes more boring and monotonous. Another drawback concerning
this
could be losing
job
satisfaction because individuals usually prefer to avoid a demanding
job
, which has a lot of
workloads
Fix the agreement mistake
workload
show examples
because they do not have enough time for recreational activities. One example of
this
issue could be employees having no day off and they cannot hang out with families and friends to have amusement. In conclusion, in my view, the advantages including, earning more money and promoting in a
job
are greater than the disadvantages
such
as decreasing spirit and losing
job
satisfaction.
Submitted by soheilrealmadrid on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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