IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

many people say that a person`s success is a result of the way they have been brought up by their parents

#people #person`s #success #parents
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is true but many
parents
Use synonyms
 are overly permissive and tend to spoil their
children
Use synonyms
, In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 is not
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
pareting
Correct your spelling
parenting
 style, and it can have a range of negative long-term consequences. I think that all people agree with
this
Linking Words
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, If
parents
Use synonyms
 want to raise respectful and well-behaved
children
Use synonyms
, I believe that a certain amount of discipline is necessary.
Parents
Use synonyms
 should not spoil their
children
Use synonyms
children
Use synonyms
 should develop themselves and tell them no when they want something in some events when they behave badly and try to trespass.
This
Linking Words
 is the only way to help young people to regulate their desires and develop self-control. In my opinion,
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
show examples
 do the opposite and constantly give in to their
children
Use synonyms
's demands are actually doing more harm than good.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 my friend's sister when she was little
she
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was very pampered and when she grew up and she cared about the feelings and needs of others.
In addition
Linking Words
, to succeed
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
children
Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
 must strictly raise their
children
Use synonyms
 if they pamper it can lead to
negative
Correct article usage
a negative
show examples
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
.
In spite
Change preposition
Spite
show examples
of
Correct pronoun usage
thisof
show examples
, one
consequences
Change to a singular noun
consequence
show examples
 of
such
Linking Words
 an attitude can
that
Add a missing verb
be that
show examples
 these teenagers which pamper they are unable to work successfully in teams with
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 colleagues in the future.
This
Linking Words
 may lead
for example
Linking Words
, to unrelated ongoings, unwise financial decisions, or even criminal activity.
For instance
Linking Words
, my
parents
Use synonyms
we
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will be raised strictly to be successful in the future. In conclusion,
parents
Use synonyms
 should help their
children
Use synonyms
 to develop self-control and respect for others,I believe that
parents
Use synonyms
 will raise their
children
Use synonyms
 and achieve their goals
Submitted by ina1_95 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: