IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Every year government and individuals spent money on New Year and religious celebration (Agree or disagree).

#year #government #individuals #money #celebration
A number of individuals suppose that the most effective way to evaluate children’s knowledge is to pass exams, whereas others claim that it is a hazardous idea and
students
Correct word choice
that students
show examples
 are suffering from tension. From my vantage point,
examination
Add an article
the examination
an examination
show examples
 is considered to be the worst approach for
juveniles’
Change noun form
juveniles
show examples
 assessment.
This
 method of understanding the level of adolescents is destructive and leads to burnout and stress. To commence, the system of
tests
 helps youngsters to study hard during the academic year.
Furthermore
, examinations promote competition among students,
therefore
, they push themselves to the limits and pass all the
tests
 with flying colours. Control
tests
 teach
to
Correct pronoun usage
us to
show examples
 overcome weaknesses and work on them properly. An article, which was published in a Russian magazine, says that If adolescents studied unsuccessfully, they would not be able to complete exams excellently.
In addition
, a student, who is involved in exam preparation, has strong endurance and
ability
Correct article usage
the ability
show examples
 to adapt to large amounts of information.
Nevertheless
, there are some people who think
otherwise
. A huge number of adolescents are under strain because of the examinations.
To begin
 with, the most indispensable part of the control
tests
 is
fear
Correct article usage
the fear
show examples
 of failure. It is acknowledged that anxiety before the assessment leads to unsatisfactory results,
hence
 it is impossible to estimate a student's level correctly.
Moreover
, according to the Daily Mail, an abundance of respondents
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the survey claim that exams do not represent the real capacities of a youngster, and
also
 test abilities superficially. (Конструкция not only.. but
also
???)
Submitted by dulskywork on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: