Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters ( such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them

#people #children #choices #matters #food #clothes #entertainment #society #individuals #decisions

Some

parents

think that accepting their

children

makes options in their daily life causes them to become selfish human beings in our society. Meanwhile, others think that

children

should learn to take care of themselves at an early age. Scientifically, certain periods require

parents

to spend adequate time raising their

children

as better citizens in their personality. Yet, there are stages of

children

’s cognitive development and learning with a massive effort from their guardians. In early stages

such

as an infant and a toddler, the participation from

parents

asks to build emotional intelligence called EQ (emotional quotient). It is responsible to perceive the emotion which is linked to the left brain functionally. To raise

children

with robust EQ, the

parents

should stimulate their sensorimotor nerve endings by touching, tasting, and listening.

Therefore

, EQ development is completely connected with receiving new attempts from

parents

which can build their character in the future. Intriguingly,

children

start creating their egocentric cognitive skills in the later stage from middle childhood to adolescence. During

this

period,

children

are eager to expose themselves to unknown experiences by learning from both success and failure. Functionally, the right brain is in charge of the intellectual quotient which gets more mature to increase the survival rate in a competitive society. At

this

stage, the

parents

should counsel their

children

to be more independent enough to take responsibility. To sum up, there are specific periods in

children

’s cognitive development and learning to be allowed to make their own choices.

Otherwise

, the

parents

should attend to support their

children

during a certain period of childhood.

Finally

, my position is neutral on both statements from my point of view as a medical doctor.

Submitted by sun_shine159 on Thu Jan 19 2023

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Autonomy
Consequence-awareness
Self-centered
Informal decision-making education
Child development
Age-appropriate choices
Cognitive growth
Fostering independence
Parental guidance
Societal norms
Interpersonal consideration
Balance of freedom
Individualism versus collectivism
Experience-based learning

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Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Mobile phones have brought many benefits, but they have also had negative effects. Do the disadvantages of having mobile phones outweigh the advantages?

Governments give lots of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been spent better elsewhere. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that building tall building is the best way to create more housing space, while other people believe it's better to build many houses on land. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people think the newly built houses should be the same as the old houses in local areas. Others argue that local authorities should allow people to build houses in their own style. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?