to what extent do you agree or disagree that young people who commit crimes should be treated the same as adults who commit crimes

#people #crimes #adults

It is true that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young crime is increasing at a terrifying rate all over the world. While some

people

tend towards the viewpoint that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

offenders

should receive less

punishment

than adults who commit

crimes

, I would have to support the idea that

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

people

who commit

crimes

should be treated the same as adults. On the one hand, it is understandable for some

people

to believe

the

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

mental intelligence is not fully matured at a young age, in which case

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

people

are more likely to commit

crimes

if influenced by others.

Therefore

, education, other than

punishment

should be the main guiding strategy when dealing with

such

crimes

On the other hand

, since young

offenders

are defined as persons without civil capacity from a legal point of view, it is

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

bona fide that they should receive a lighter

punishment

when committing the same

crimes

than

Change preposition

show examples

adults.

However

Change preposition

from

show examples

the victims’ point of view, the sufferings of the victims and their

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

made no sense no matter how old the

offenders

are.

Moreover

people

who commit

crimes

are tend

Change the verb form

tend

show examples

to be influenced by the education of their family and school, and the criminal motive of an adult could originate from

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

childhood experience.

On the other hand

, it is understandable that

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

adult

offender

Fix the agreement mistake

offenders

show examples

could regret

for

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

their

crimes

with greater maturity. In conclusion, the measurements of

punishment

depend on the criminal

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

, and the attitude of the

offenders

, rather than the age of the

people

who committed

crimes

Submitted by bunyanchen on Sat Jan 21 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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to what extent do you agree or disagree that young people who commit crimes should be treated the same as adults who commit crimes

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Doctor, nurse and teachers make a great contribution to the society and should be paid more than entertainment and sports celebrities. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, crime rates are increasing. What are the causes of this problem? What can be done about it?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many people think that the best way to learn a culture is to learn the language of it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this .