Some people think that governments should change the way individuals live, while others believe they should choose the way themselves. Discuss these both points of view and give your opinion?
Some individuals opine that it is necessary that governments are in charge of their residents' lifestyles.
However
, this
belief contradicts other people
's views, who tend to think that humanity needs to stay independent and opt for the way to live on its own. This
essay will elucidate both statements and express the opinion of the author.
Monitoring and altering the lifestyle of the nation was a common thing back in the past. This
measure was usually taken when the lifestyle of residents did not meet the expectations of the authority. Take ancient Greece as an epitome, Haleska king felt totally distraught after taking the throne. He came to realize how weak, illiterate and pathetic his nation was. To fix this
and reach prosperity, he enforced the new law system, that deprived local people
of any entertainment possible at that time, including theatres and playhouses. Furthermore
, the focus needed to be switched to the country
's development, academic success and strengthening the national defence. Every citizen aged 5, despite their gender, was obliged to enrol in special educational institutes and learn the basics of military training. Those, who defied the law were sentenced to death. It took Haleska less than a year to reach marked success in academic and military terms. Yet by 345 B.C., the country
went haywire and people
rebelled for freedom. As a result
, 3 months later the country
was fully destroyed.
Liberty is a crucial aspect for each human. When people
are free to choose the way they live, the risk of civil war substantially decreases. However
, providing too much freedom can also
lead to unwanted consequences. To prove that, Libya witnessed a catastrophic economic decline along with
an increase in crime rate after the new president made the use of marihuana legal, considering it a right of people
to consume whatever they want to and choose whatever they think is good for them.
Considering my own opinion, I hold the view that being free to choose the life you want to live is better than being captivated by the government and obeying the rules because of fright, but only provided that government
is able to change whatever brings detrimental effects to the Correct article usage
the government
country
.
To conclude
, freedom is the key only when there is a monitor as well. That is
to say, governments should not interfere in the life
of Fix the agreement mistake
lives
people
despite the negative behaviour and some actions, such
as the use of drugs, and weapons. Balance is essential everywhere.Submitted by kaiakaya3002 on
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task response
Your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the topic and presents both points of view effectively. Ensure that your supporting examples are well-developed and directly relate to the points you are making.
coherence cohesion
Your essay is mostly well-organized with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, pay attention to the logical flow of ideas and ensure that each paragraph connects smoothly with the next.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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