Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both shools and parents are resposible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Today, the vast majority of young generations do not follow a healthy style of life. Many people believe that not only parents but
also
schools are accountable in order to resolve
this
concern. My opinion about
this
idea probably falls somewhere in the middle, since the children often are not able to control their
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
and distinguish what is advisable for them, but more depends on their self-awareness about something wrong.
This
essay goes into
details
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detail
show examples
of
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about
show examples
both approaches.   One idea proposes that people at
young
Add an article
a young
show examples
age cannot manage to restrain themselves from junk
food
.
Hence
, they need parental or
scholactic
Correct your spelling
scholastic
monitoring. Because in case responsible persons maintain teenagers with
relevant
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the relevant
show examples
healthy
food
menu
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menus
show examples
, they are not going to face problems with nutrition. Particularly, education establishments play a considerable role, as nowadays more
food
is being consumed by children at school. Dutch schools can
surve
Correct your spelling
serve
as the most applicable example. Where
food
is
surved
Correct your spelling
served
free of charge for the full functioning of the
organizm
Correct your spelling
organism
.
Moreover
, meals are given according to
exact
Correct article usage
the exact
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schedule.
This
technique provides strict control and even leaves no worries for parents.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
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means that schools can
also
affect
on
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apply
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a youth's healthy lifestyle.   But on the downside, unbalanced feeding is inevitable among young unless they are conscious about
it's
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its
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insalubrity. Now it has reached a point where a growing number of
adolescent
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adolescents
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aimlessly eat anything they want without thinking that it could harm their body in a number of ways.
Moreover
, sometimes they do not obey anyone, nor their parents,
nor
Correct word choice
or
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school. And often it is likely to worsen the gaps even trying to
iliminate
Correct your spelling
eliminate
a problem. So owing to
this
, children need to
self-aware
Add a missing verb
be self-aware
show examples
the
Change preposition
of the
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harm and get rid of bad
habbits
Correct your spelling
habits
, building
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
right style of life themselves without interventions.   Having concluded my ideas, young ones need adult control, but it is controllable as soon as they comprehend it
by
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on
show examples
their own
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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