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Writing Samples
Band 5

increasing number of people are choosing cosmetology surgery to improve their appearance. What are the reasons? Do you think is it a positive or negative development?

#people #cosmetology #surgery #appearance #development
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The advancement in medical technology has enabled
people
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 to alter their
appearances
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.
Due to
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this
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,
beauty
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 surgery and other physical modifications are getting more popular in
the
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apply
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society. Personally, I think
this
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not
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is not
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 a positive development.
This
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 essay will examine why
people
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 are inclined to modify their physical features and elaborate on my stance. Nowadays, physical standards are getting more unrealistic as the
media
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 is dominated
with
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by
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 flawless celebrities, especially in
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beauty related
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beauty-related
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 advertisements.
For some
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Some
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people
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, when they see these advertisements, they would compare themselves physically and try to
immitate
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imitate
 the featured model. With countless
media
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 promoting models with perfect facial and body features,
the
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apply
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society can no longer accept their own
appearances
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, and they end up resorting to surgery to match the popular standards.
Moreover
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, social
media
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 is enhancing
this
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 effect.
In addition
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 to flawless models,
people
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 can easily judge each other's
appearances
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 online. Without any direct consequences when commenting on social
media
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, more
people
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 are recklessly bringing
people
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 down by commenting negatively on someone's physical features.
This
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 has a detrimental effect on some
people
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, especially on their self-image, which causes them to be inclined towards changing their
appearances
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. In my opinion, self-image and
beauty
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 standards should not be determined by others. Each person has their own strengths and weaknesses, and perhaps for some
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people
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,people
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 their strength is not in
beauty
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. When
people
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 cannot find satisfaction or take pride in their looks, they should try to re-evaluate their way of thinking and put emphasis on things that they know they are good at.
To conclude
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, I think physical modifications are not a positive development. They imply
unsatisfactory
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an unsatisfactory
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of
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with
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self
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the self
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 and set a bad thread of influence in
the
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apply
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society.
Submitted by sam_danielo on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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