It is important to give children a possibility to act independently and make their own decisions from early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this idea?

Although
there is a campaign to live freely in
this
world, I strongly disagree
if
Correct word choice
that
show examples
people give opportunities to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children
in order to create their own decisions. The young generations
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lack
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
experience and knowledge. In
this
cycle of life,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
children
ought to observe their parents, learn a lot of mistakes, and distinguish between the wrong actions and the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
correct actions.
Furthermore
, they need
guided
Replace the word
guidance
show examples
from their parents, resulting in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
higher quality of their life.
For instance
, if offsprings try to smoke because they do
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
know whether it is right or not, the parents should be there and prevent the phenomenon. If youngsters create their own options, they will
misleaded
Correct your spelling
mislead
, and it might develop
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
bad habits and diseases,
such
as stroke and heart failure.
On the other hand
, the juniors are still unstable with their emotions and actions.
This
can
be happen
Change the verb form
happen
show examples
because they
are still learn
Change the verb form
are still learning
show examples
about people's
life
Replace the word
lives
show examples
and
also
the
environtment
Correct your spelling
environment
. To illustrate
this
, if adults can give the best figure and raise their
children
perfectly, like there is no divorce and
fight
Replace the word
fighting
show examples
between each other, the
children
will have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
stability of emotions, positive personality traits, and decent academic performances in the future.
To sum up
, I completely disagree to provide youngsters
Add the preposition
with an
show examples
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
opportunites
Correct your spelling
opportunity
to move independently. In
this
case, the adults have a role to guide and be the best figure to prevent
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
detrimental effects on the young generations
Submitted by rafiaufa18 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • autonomy
  • empower
  • nurture
  • authority
  • guidance
  • mentor
  • self-reliance
  • resourcefulness
  • initiative
  • innovation
  • responsibility
  • adulthood
  • independent thinking
  • critical thinking
  • obligations
  • achievement
What to do next:
Look at other essays: