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Band 4

Many people believe that spending a lot of money on celebrations (birthdays/weddings) is a waste of money. Others believe that it is important for the individuals and society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #money #celebrations #birthdays #weddings #waste #individuals #society
Needless to say, celebrations is
the
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apply
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paramount for regional and other ceremonies.
Nevertheless
, some
people
 concur that excessive use of budget on birthdays and weddings consider
as
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apply
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worthless
of
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money
.
While
,
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 other folks reject
this
 notion and
convines
Correct your spelling
convinced
 that it's important for
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
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 happiness and society. Both views have their own reasons which will be discussed in the forthcoming paragraphs. First of all, most
people
 take out
for
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their saving
money
 from the bank or locker,
Correct word choice
and
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spend on special occasions, especially
to
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for
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 photographers.
For instance
, folks from
low income
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low-income
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 families, work hard
for
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apply
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the
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apply
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day and night for their dream wedding or in some cases, lent
money
 from other
people
 with high interest, throw grant functions to other
people
 to showcase their status to other relatives. Another fact to consider is that birthday is one of the special
day
Fix the agreement mistake
days
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 for
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the individual
an individual
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individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
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 which
is happen
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is happening
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in
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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annually
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annual
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,
people
 treat them very specially on
this
 particular day.
However
, spending large
money
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
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 waste of value
instead
 invest
money
 in
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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other fields.
Hence
, it's apparent why many
people
in
Add a missing verb
are in
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 favour of
this
 trend.
On the other hand
, celebrations
such
 as birthdays and weddings
is
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are
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very
Correct article usage
a very
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curcial
Correct your spelling
crucial
 part
in
Change preposition
of
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 everyone's life which may
brings
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bring
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alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
 of happiness
into
Change preposition
to
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people
.
Therefore
,
people
 should spend
money
 based on
financial
Correct pronoun usage
their financial
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 background. To illustrate, Ambani's son is the one of
top
Add an article
a top
the top
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 businessman in the world, who spend more billion of
money
 for wedding ceremonies
due to
 high administrators and other authority
people
 are attended the
people
,
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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