Children brought up in families with less money are better prepared for life than those from wealthy families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#children #families #money #life

There is a conviction among people that people who were grown up in low-income families are far more ready for

life

in contrast

to those who are brought up in opulent conditions. My views bear a resemblance to

this

concept. Since needy

children

are already adapted to

life

Change noun form

life's

show examples

difficulties,

hence

they have

ability

Add an article

the ability

show examples

from releasing from a predicament. Unlike, it is hard for those, who have

not

Add the particle

tonot

show examples

meet

Wrong verb form

met

show examples

any hardships throughout the entire period of their childhood, to deal with

this

in the future. I summarize the ideas and go into more

details

Fix the agreement mistake

detail

show examples

this

essay. Naturally, the more challenges one has faced, the easier it is to struggle with.

Thus

, deprived

children

are more willing to

life

trials.

This

is a result of the experience they gained. Having experienced difficulties in living position, finances, and health in the past, people accumulate skills.

Moreover

, they get used to it. Thanks to what, tomorrow, it may seem to them not only as a normal case, but

also

they would already be familiar with the solution and the way out of the problem. Soren Kierkeaard's famous quote might serve as an applicable example. "

Life

is not a problem to be solved, but a reality to be experienced", he presumes. If background experience is anything to go by,

children

, accustomed to comfort, are in trouble. Because parents of rich youth provide everything for them at any time. Whether it is education, clothing, or even housing.

As a result

this

adolescent is not let to feel difficulty.

Consequently

, it is going to be complicated for them in the future to face it first.

To conclude

my thoughts, adaptation makes anything lighter,

therefore

children

grew

Correct pronoun usage

who grew

show examples

up in poor families are better prepared for

life

tests.

Submitted by sadullaevajasmin18 on Sat Jan 28 2023

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Children brought up in families with less money are better prepared for life than those from wealthy families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some people think governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems to help people to prevent illness and disease

While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree?