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Writing Samples
Band 7

In some countries, small town-center shops are going out of business because people tend to drive to large out-of-town stores. As a result, people without cars have limited access to out-of-town stores, and it may result in an increase in the use of cars. Do you think the disadvantages of this change outweigh its advantages?

#countries #town-center #shops #business #people #drive #stores #cars #access #change
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Unlikely some of the countries people are trying to take the
business
Use synonyms
 to the large size of shop from out-of-town.
Therefore
Linking Words
 people are interested to go by car;
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 use of cars
day
Use synonyms
 by
day
Use synonyms
 increasing.
Although
Linking Words
 the benefits of
this
Linking Words
 trend are varied, in my ,opinion the inconvenience is much more significant. On the one hand, now our population are increasing to the outer
side
Use synonyms
 of the metro
city
Use synonyms
; the reason behind
this
Linking Words
 fact is, Frist of all cost of the
business
Use synonyms
 can be affordable to all.
Like customers
Change preposition
Customers
show examples
 can take any kind of product very chipper and more affordable.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 can boost the economical condition increase to
this
Linking Words
 area like the metro
city
Use synonyms
; the density of the population
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 mitigated in the large area. For that reason the out-of-small town is developing and modernizing
; ,
Change the punctuation
;
,
show examples
Linking Words
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
show examples
this
Linking Words
city
Use synonyms
's government want to try to relocate all kind of facilities for others.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, If
increasing
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
 the shopping to
outside
Correct article usage
the outside
show examples
side
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
 most of the time people want to try using a car; It is impacted the environment and reduces natural fuel like gas and diesel; Mostly our ecosystem is going to threaten. If increasing the use of cars is
then
Linking Words
 carbon emissions will increase as well .
Additionally
Linking Words
, our natural resources are
day
Use synonyms
 by
day
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 decreasing
due to
Linking Words
 the huge use of vehicles. We are affected in both ways; rising carbon footprint and our greenhouse effects impacted by the global ecosystem. In conclusion, developing our
city
Use synonyms
side
Use synonyms
 to getting the cheaper price of materials and new
business
Use synonyms
 development for customers and
business
Use synonyms
 owners. I totally disagree, using the car to the outer
side
Use synonyms
 of town to decrease the environmental condition.
Submitted by nuresadikchowdhury175 on

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