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Band 3

Maintaining public libraries is a waste of time since computer technology is now replacing their functions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#libraries #waste #time #computer #technology #functions
Nowadays,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
computer
 technology is quite advanced than before with high speed and large memory space. It is assumed that the existence of
this
 technology can replace the functions of public
libraries
 to avoid a waste of
time
 to maintain them. I disagree with the idea because
in
Add the comma(s)
,in
show examples
 my opinion,
computer
technique
Fix the agreement mistake
techniques
show examples
 can not absolutely possess all the functions which public
libraries
 have. Not all the
people
 have knowledge or
time
 to use the
computer
 freely. Many old
people
 don’t know how to search for information
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
computer
Add an article
a computer
show examples
 or even use it, but they can go directly to public
libraries
 for finding
books
what
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 they need. Many students should study at school for a long
time
 a day. They don’t have much
time
 to read
books
 using
computer
Add an article
a computer
the computer
show examples
 at home.
However
, they can borrow
books
in
Change preposition
from
show examples
 public
libraries
 to read them at any
time
. Public
libraries
 can serve more
people
 than computers do.
Besides
, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 too much information on the Internet. The one who
want
Change the verb form
wants
show examples
 to search for some e-
books
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
computer
Add an article
the computer
a computer
show examples
 may be disturbed by advertisements and wrong information.
Time
 would be taken up by them. But
books
 in
libraries
 are located in their special places where can be found easily by readers.
People
 will not worry about finding what they want for a long
time
. All in all, both public
libraries
 and e-book
libraries
 should be selected
by
Change preposition
for
show examples
readers’
Change noun form
readers
show examples
 own.
Submitted by 806960230 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • community hub
  • socioeconomic disparity
  • digital divide
  • cultural heritage
  • literacy rates
  • quiet sanctuary
  • environmental sustainability
  • information literacy
  • cost-benefit analysis
  • social isolation
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