Some people argue that we should do research into their family history. Others, agree with the view that we should focus on the present and future generations. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #research #history #focus #future #generations

There are controversial perspectives heating a debate over historical research.

While

some claim that it is vital for

people

to discover their historical background, the opposite makes a statement that concentrating on the current and next

generations

plays

such

a paramount significance role.

While

each has its own perks, I would contend that it is optimal to combine both mentioned elements. Without a shadow of a doubt, it is

such

an immense necessity to research family background.

This

due to

the fact that discovering can assist

people

to have more understanding about their family tree so that they can preserve tradition and vocational skills. To be more specific, pottery, weaving and embroidering can be cited as some appealing examples that need to be conserved family traditional skills and transmitted to the subsequent

generations

in order to avoid disappearing.

Therefore

, discovering family background contributes

abundant

Change preposition

to abundant

show examples

vital factors.

While

the essence of diving

Change preposition

into

show examples

historical information about the family is widely acknowledged, focusing on nowadays and the upcoming

generations

also

crucial for

people

This

is owing to the fact that these persons are to be present and appear promptly when

people

are in an emergency circumstance. To be more particular, when

people

have financial difficulties, parents, siblings, cousins, and relatives are the ones whom

people

can turn to for assistance.

Moreover

people

need to focus on in the form of spending time and looking after these

people

in order to strengthen family bonds.

Hence

, it is

also

vital for

people

to contrate on their current and future

generations

. In conclusion, from my point of view, discovering historical aspects of family and focusing on the generation in

this

day and age

as well as

in the upcoming days both have essential impacts.

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Mon Jan 30 2023

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task achievement

Ensure to clearly state your position in the introduction to guide the reader through your argument. This establishes a solid foundation for your essay.

task achievement

Work on integrating more concrete examples to support your points. Specific examples add depth to your arguments and make your essay more persuasive.

coherence cohesion

Your essay benefits from a strong logical structure and excellent linkage between ideas. Continue to use transition words and maintain this coherence in your writing.

coherence cohesion

While your essay is well-structured, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. This clarity can further enhance the cohesion of your text.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

291 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people argue that we should do research into their family history. Others, agree with the view that we should focus on the present and future generations. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Today, newspapers and televisions are giving detailed descriptions on crimes. Some people believe such a practice will cause bad consequences and thus media should be restricted. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

A city should try to preserve its old, historic buildings rather than replacing them with modern buildings. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some people believe that radio is the best way to get news while others think that television is better for this purpose. Discuss both views and give your opinion with relevant examples.

Some people feel that the legal age at which people can marry should be at least 21. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The restoration of an old building in major cities in the world cost numerous governments' expenditures. This money should be used in new housing and road development. Do you agree or disagree?