Some people think parents should supervise their children’s activities closely, while others believe children should have more freedom. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Advances in technology bring a new rise to freedom for
children
. As we know , children
nowadays, like to live freely without any interruption from parents
. while
few argue that parents
to eagle an eye on their young generation to closely Analyse the activities,however
others believe that Add the comma(s)
,however
children
live as free as birds. This
essay will discuss both views and provide a conclusion.
To begin
with, advancement
of science and technology Correct article usage
the advancement
create
Correct subject-verb agreement
creates
a
various resources for Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
children's
. Change noun form
children
Thus
, substantial
number of Add an article
a substantial
Add an article
a youngster
youngster
going to use Fix the agreement mistake
youngsters
this
as
Change preposition
in
an
wrong Change the article
a
ways
. So Correct the article-noun agreement
way
parents
should plays
a significant role in Change the verb form
play
this
to provide a
right information about the Correct article usage
the
utilitization
. For, example , in India Correct your spelling
utilization
thousands
Add the preposition
ofthousands
parents
do not purchased
a cell Change the verb form
purchase
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
to
their Change preposition
for
children
. Because their
are numerous not relevant applications which distract young people from the path . Replace the word
there
Althought
, Correct your spelling
Although
in
the supervision of Change preposition
under
parents
children's
do not Change noun form
children
mixed
with bad companies which Change the verb form
mix
is
unwanted Change the verb form
are
plus
give a negative impact on them to consume drugs and use abusive language .
Correct word choice
and
On the other hand
, freedom is also
important in this
modern era, there are numerous benefits of
it. If Change preposition
to
children
move freely they should have a
potential time to know about talent and Correct article usage
the
experienced
Wrong verb form
experience
the
society to know their abilities and build Correct article usage
apply
a
interpersonal skills . Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
Therefore
, meet
new peoples give Wrong verb form
meeting
a
opportunity to Change the article
an
children
to be a
motivated , Correct article usage
apply
Correct word choice
and self-confidence
self-confidence
and remove Replace the word
self-confident
the
hesitation . Correct article usage
apply
Furthermore
, it build
a strong relationship Change the verb form
builds
their
friend , Change preposition
with their
due to
this
increased the
life Change the word
their
requirment
and trust their Correct your spelling
requirement
parents
more . For , example , in Us
Correct article usage
the Us
children's
live Change noun form
children
thier
own space to succeed and Correct your spelling
their
passionate
in life .
In conclusion, Add a missing verb
be passionate
importance
of supervision is required for Add an article
the importance
children
to be
live a better and Unnecessary verb
apply
decipline
life . Correct your spelling
discipline
disciplined
However
, many opportunities are recommended which
Correct word choice
that
is
freely available to Correct subject-verb agreement
are
experienced
.Change the verb
experience
Submitted by Jimmydehal090 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?