IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Should young people follow the older people’s examples or it’s good for them to challenge older people’s opinions and thoughts. Discuss both the views and give your .

#people #people’s #it’s #challenge #thoughts
People
 face various difficulties at different stages of
life
.
Therefore
, they need to work hard to find a way to overcome them somehow.
While
 some
people
 believe that the young should rely on the
advice
 from the old to gain a better
life
, others believe that individual decisions are more important today. I personally support the latter view for the following reasons. On one hand, young
people
 should follow the seniors'
advice
 to have a satisfactory
life
 in future. In fact, older generations tend to put more emphasis on patience and hard work and those who respect them are more likely to gain outstanding academic achievements and successful career opportunities than those who ignore them and solely stick to their own minds.
In other words
, their
advice
 is dependable and trustworthy because they are usually proven by their actual experience.
In addition
, their continuous encouragement not to give up efforts allows young
people
 to gain more confidence to challenge various hurdles in
life
.
On the other hand
, it is increasingly necessary for the young to challenge
such
 traditional ideas of the old
due to
 the fast-changing society today. There is a rising demand for new skills and experience in the current age of globalization and technology.
As a result
, hard work and patience may no longer be effective on some occasions.
For example
, many companies tend to stress the importance of creativity as they tend to prefer applicants who can think outside of the box more than those who only possess traditional ideas.
This
 is why many organizations conduct more interview tests than conventionally written exams to evaluate individual knowledge and skills. In conclusion, it is helpful for the young to count on the
advice
 from the older generations as their ideas and thoughts are often based on their own experience.
However
, new skills are gradually demanded in modern society when
people
 are more expected to tackle different challenges that their ancestors have not experienced.
Submitted by mizuho_kondo117 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Wisdom
  • Experience
  • Mistakes
  • Guidance
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Status quo
  • Fresh ideas
  • Perspective
  • Advancements
  • Societal harmony
  • Respecting
  • Adhering to
  • Generational conflicts
  • Mutual understanding
  • Progress
  • Evolve
  • Customs
  • Question
  • Reform
  • Outdated
  • Concepts
  • Drive progress
  • Critically evaluate
  • Balance
  • Tradition
  • Embracing
What to do next:
Look at other essays: