IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people believe that technology has made man more social. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#people #technology #man
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In
past
Correct article usage
the past
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 few decades, a bunch of technological revolutions have taken place. Some
people
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 found that
technology
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 has made
human
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humans
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 more civil. I totally support that thought because
technology
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 gave us the platform to connect on
global
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a global
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 level, which would be
otherwise
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 impossible. First and foremost, some
people
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 think that there are still a bunch of population left, which is not familiar
about
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with
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 the everchanging technological advancement.
For instance
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, old
people
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 do not have any clue how modern cell phones work,
even
Correct word choice
and even
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 if we talk about millennials they are not as
pro
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a pro
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 to be socialized by the means of
technology
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.
Moreover
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,
people
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 are hesitant to use it because of the inclination
in
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toward
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 cybercrimes, we hear in news almost
everyday
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every day
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 that how
people
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 are getting scammed. On the positive part, It provides a global platform, where one can associate with another without any boundaries.
For example
Linking Words
, social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram and many more witnessed
lot
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a lot
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 of
people
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 getting connected despite
of
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apply
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their location and other obstacles.
Furthermore
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, there are still
lot
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a lot
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 of
people
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 who are
extrovert
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extroverts
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 or have a fear of speaking in public, so rather use
technology
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 to be more social and
being
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be
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 vocal about their opinions.
While
Linking Words
 discussing both viewpoints, I think
technology
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 has proven as a boom to be more social disregarding distance.
People
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 are gradually adapting
a
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to a
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change and are not so rigid about it because they know it is a great innovation and is a need of
Correct your spelling
today's
todays
Change to a genitive case
today's
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 era
Submitted by sharnthandi7 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social interaction
  • connect
  • communicate
  • video conferencing
  • stay in touch
  • online communities
  • forums
  • like-minded individuals
  • global communication
  • collaboration
  • access to information
  • knowledge
  • bridge the gap
  • social isolation
  • detachment
  • face-to-face communication
  • genuine human connection
  • maintain
  • real-life interactions
  • balance
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